Reply to Was I wrong to skip MIL birthday dinner?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Was I wrong to skip MIL birthday dinner?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]The whole “someday you will be a grandparent” bit is so tired.[/b]

Yes, someday I hope to be a grandparent. And because I wasn’t raised in a barn, I would never throw out plans to busy parents with kids with only 24 hours of notice. I will respect my kids and their spouses enough to make invitations with lead time, and I’ll be open to alternate plans. We’ll figure out something that works for everyone, then we’ll enjoy each other’s company.

This will work especially well for things where you KNOW WHAT THE SPECIAL DATE IS, and can plan accordingly. It’s not like birthdays move around, FFS. [/quote]

It’s tired because the lack of self awareness is tiring. There seems to be a whole generation of women calling their MILs selfish and crazy when they can’t see their own rigidity and bitterness. Anyone at the point where they're saying things like “what adult even wants a birthday celebration?” Is the one who is cruel and mocking and it would be hard to believe their MIL problems are one sided.[/quote]

The lack of self-awareness and rigidity is on the other side of the relationship. My mother had an excellent relationship with my father’s mother, she even lived with us at times. It would never have occurred to my grandmother that my mother should drop everything with the days notice shuttling two kids around to attend a dinner for her. She was deeply respectful of my mother‘s time and efforts, and she never missed an opportunity to tell the kids how lucky we were to have a mother like my mother. Try more gratitude and less entitlement as a mother-in-law and you will likely get further.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics