Reply to Insensitive Drs at Childrens (overweight child)

Forum Index » Health and Medicine

Reply to "Insensitive Drs at Childrens (overweight child) "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I know this may not be a "special needs" issue exactly but I need to share. 
My DD is 16 and she was admitted to children's hospital in DC. she has no special needs per se. She is overweight, but in the 4 months prior to being admitted she lost 35 lbs. At the hospital it was a constant struggle. she weighs 230, and she is 5'4. The doctors were the most insensitvie people i have ever encountered. she was in the hospital for a head injury but they made no hesistation to send in the nutrtionist and some other doctors to tell her that she was overweight. meanwhile we are waiting 2 days to get seen by the actual neurologist. DD has great eating skills and makes sure to exercise at least 4 times a week, which is how she lost the weight. But i feel like the way she was treated at childrens was obnoxious. they even went as far as to but on the discharge form under how her stomach felt (when they do the physical exam) "soft obese belly". really? WTF. before she had an MRI they came in at 4 am to "measure her to make sure she could fit in the machine". again really? she is a size 14, 38-36-45 so yes while she is plus sized, she is not HUGE.  she is in high school and does not get treated even half as rudely by other teenagers. She has a wonderful personality and actually has a nice body "shape" and is beautiful (not just me as her mother, but everyone tells her that even school friends). what makes this whole thing worse is that she is 16 years old and understands that she is "fat" and is working on that. Have any other kids been treated insensitively at children's?

please do not flame me for this, i guess i just felt the need to vent. [/quote]

OP -

In the interest of full disclosure, I should say that I am a pediatric sub specialist (doctor), but I do not work at Children's.

I do not think that the doctors had the intent of insulting you or your child. They did not say she was "fat" or "ugly". They offered a nutrition consult because she is actually severely obese (her BMI is 39.5, and morbid obesity is anything over 40). They documented her abdominal exam as being soft and obese because it is - this implies that her belly was soft (which implies no serious internal pathology) but might have been difficult to palpate the internal organs (liver, spleen) due to her size. Another way we write this on a physical exam is "exam limited due to body habitus". This can pertain to many aspects of the physical exam, not just abdominal exam. Also, while it is certainly embarrassing to be measured for the MRI, they obviously had a concern so they did it. I am sure that no one was standing around discussing how someone could make your daughter feel worse about her weight than she already does. Finally, while it is great that she has lost 35 pounds, the doctors had no way of knowing that (unless you told them) and this would still not change any of the above because despite that weight loss, she remains severely obese. If you feel that you were insulted, you should take to a representative from the hospital, but it seems that the doctors were only doing their job - in documenting and recognizing a very serious health concern even though she was admitted with something else.

It is great that you are trying to maintain her self esteem. I am sure she is a beautiful girl. However, the facts are that you and your daughter are severely overweight.While hormone imbalances can certainly contribute, medically speaking, they are generally not the only cause. If she were my patient, I would discuss her weight with you at EVERY visit because it is a SERIOUS HEALTH CONCERN. She is at risk for type II diabetes, cardiovascular disease, joint disease - just to name a few - at a young age. It seems that you are both trying, but you need to keep going. From the point of view of a pediatrician, I do not actually care about YOUR weight - just in the way it impacts HER weight (just like if were a smoker I would not care so much unless you had a child with asthma).

I can tell you that when I see an obese child, it makes me sad for many reasons -and I think most pediatricians feel the same way. First, I am sad because of the social stigma that obesity carries. Being a child (esp adolescent) is difficult enough socially - gaining acceptance and fitting in. Second (and most importantly) I am sad for the medical implications. Thirds, as a woman, I am sad because I know it is a lifelong struggle - something that will always be an issue in the child's life. Fourth, especially when the child has obese parents, I am sad because the family is either in denial or makes it more difficult for that child to lose weight because of their own eating habits and physical activity. 100% of the time it would never occur to me to intentionally embarrass or shame the child (but I would recognize that any discussion of the issue would of course be uncomfortable). Just because it is uncomfortable does not mean that I would not address it.

You need to make this a priority for your daughter (and yourself) - not because she will be more beautiful but because she will be MORE HEALTHY. If you do it together, you will support each other and likely be more successful (the whole basis of weight watchers). Good luck to you both.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics