Reply to Would you be resentful if your partner worked only 3-4 hours a day?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]5 years ago I started a business, and today have built it to where I make about 50% more than H working only 3-4 hours a day (sometimes less). Mostly I did this out of necessity, since H had zero flexibility with his job and I took on most childcare.

H doesn't really know how little I work. I've barely worked at all since early December. I don't want to take on more domestic work - right now it's split 50/50. I know if he saw that I work, then go spend the rest of the day at the gym or watching Netflix, he'd probably feel resentful at the amount of leisure time I have. And expect me to either do more domestic work or work more so we make more money. I don't want to do either.

Anyone in this situation? How do you handle it?[/quote]

No one would be resentful that their partner is lucky enough to not have to slave full day for some corporation to make a living but they will resent that instead of sharing your good luck with family to make it easy for everyone by taking some chores off of your plate, you are being selfish. Wouldn't you feel it if you were in their shoes? Just be fair or be single.[/quote]
+1
Are you in for yourself or for your family? OP is only in for herself and leaving her DH out to dry. [/quote]

OP. So like, the entire reason I started this business is H wanted to take his dream job, which has long hours and he often has to leave the house by 6am or stay late. It also does not pay very well - not bad, but not great. I had the constraints that I needed to make up for the pay cut while also only working the hours of 9-3 because of kid schedules, I figured out a way to do that, and got so efficient that I really only have to work 9-12.

I agreed to this, but part of our agreement was also that he would take on extra domestic work since I was on-duty with kids basically 24/7. I get the kids ready in the morning and take them to school/daycare. I pick them up, including early release once a week. I handle the sick days and snow days.

He's not some poor guy chained to a desk, miserable. He has a job he loves.

The thought of having to spend those hours I don't need to work (12-3 or so) cleaning toilets or vacuuming or starting dinner or whatever so H can have the dream job AND no domestic work is depressing. I don't want to do that.[/quote]

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