Reply to What should college dc be told about our divorce? DH is cheating and leaving to pursue a relationship with his mistress.

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Reply to "What should college dc be told about our divorce? DH is cheating and leaving to pursue a relationship with his mistress."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would not lie and say it is amicable. (I did lie, but my kid was was 4, as an adult she knows the truth now.)  I just would not elaborate or be negative. Dad wishes to pursue a relationship with someone else. It is okay to say you are still processing this new information, but that you know you will be fine.

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Speaking for myself and what I was like as a college student, “Dad wishes to pursue a relationship with someone else,” is NOT information I want to have before my winter exams.

I would give a white lie until the summer, and then give this sordid detail after spring exams are over.  That gives DS the summer to process what “Dad wishes to pursue a relationship with someone else,” actually means.[/quote]

Idk I had 2 friends whose parents got divorced while they were late teens- young adults. One had something similar to OPs situation and one had parents with no real reason. The kid who didn’t know/understand really struggled to get her head around it and there was more self blame, belief that her childhood was a lie, etc.

It was probably highly personality dependent but I don’t think the “we grew apart” lie is really even that helpful for kids to believe. Your family is still getting blown up, you just don’t understand why. [/quote]

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