Reply to Has anyone here on a normal income successfully FIREd?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think this is one of those situations where FIRE becomes an excuse to avoid things that a person is uncomfortable with or lacks the skills for. Note the pattern-- after college, has job and lives with parents, avoiding the responsibility of managing his own household. After some time, OP levels up to managing a home, but still isn't ready to date. It's too hard to contemplate working, managing a home, and dating, so OP plans to date only after FIRE is reached. It's too hard to contemplate hands-on parenting while also being married, even with no job, so kids only after retirement of BOTH parents so that OP doesn't have to do too much parenting. FIRE is an excuse to make choices to avoid and delay taking on what feels overwhelming, and FIRE feels virtuous and prudent, but it can mask a tremendous amount of anxiety and adult skills that are not developing as they should. [/quote]

In fairness, there’s probably a *grain* of truth in this post.  I am a little bit of a perfectionist, and I’d rather do one thing at 100% than three things at 75%.  Getting married, having kids, focusing on career, and everything else at the same time at 25 would’ve been a recipe for a huge amount of stress and unpleasantness for me.

The flipside of that is that doing all of that *is* objectively difficult these days. That’s why half the DMV is on antidepressants.  Both my parents grew up on streets where they lived with their entire extended families, but in the hyper-individualized society we live now, things are more difficult.

And I’d be willing to bet that a lot of the people criticizing me are from the same camp that posts complaints about unequal divisions of household labor and how difficult is the “mental load” of staying on top of everything.  Sorry I’m not perfect, but whether these issues are a result of my own shortcomings or broader societal factors, I just acknowledge reality and own my limitations.[/quote]

You claim to own your limitations and acknowledge reality but given your posts to date it’s a little difficult to envision you bearing the brunt of the mental load, caregiving, household labor etc. It basically sounds like you just want laze around living your best life playing guitar, hiking and periodically pitching in with the kids when it suits.

There’s a reason that most women seek out/are attracted to providers….because they know most men are likely to fall short on the domestic front. Also most people don’t do well with their spouse home with them full time- hence why divorce rates rose during the pandemic.
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