Reply to Husband doesn't want to leave our kids much in inheritence

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Yes, we will further discuss and I think it is a matter of me to "nudge" him to go higher than $2M.

Just for a little history, before this, he was intent on funding a foundation to the tune of $2M.  This was a couple of years ago, when we had A LOT less money. ...DH...you are right. He is a really good and generous guy. But I am mama bear and want to protect the kiddos.

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Estate is about 14m and OP/DH might have 2-3 kids.  DH /OP came from humble backgrounds and he wanted to set up a 2m foundation [scholarships in his name?] and doesn't want to benefit his children and grandchildren ...wants name on a foundation  for ego?

Any grandchildren exist?  Why call adult DC's kiddos? Is he competitive with his children?  I did this so you should also?  [/quote]

OP here. Two kids ages 23 and 16. We're retirement age already (younger child was adopted and we had older child late in life).  So they are my kiddos--sorry if that term offends you in some way. Obviously no grandchildren yet.  I am not sure what point you are trying to make here.  DH is very successful in career and has always done charitable works, including starting a very successful non-profit that helps underprivileged kids access private school through scholarships. So not sure why you feel need to trash my husband, whom you don't even know.

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I'm sorry OP, but I'm having trouble understanding why you think leaving your children $2M, versus $14M, when you die in 20 or 30 years and during which your children will be ages 36 to 53, means that they're going to struggle.  Sure, their life could be different inheriting 14M rather than 2M, but their overall life outcome will already be set in stone by other choices they've made, i.e. their grit, what career they chose, their own feelings towards money, etc.

Are you instead concerned that your children will feel hurt if you don't leave them the substantial majority of your assets?  I think you can just ask them how they would feel, such as by asking during dinner, "hey do you think you would be upset if we left all of our money to charity?" If you raised them well, chances are they won't feel entitled to your money at all.  Personally, I would want my own parents to spend all of their money and enjoy it before they died. [/quote]

I don't want to necessarily want leave them the entire amount...just more than $2M...the purpose is to get them a good head start on eduction for their kids, etc., and based on how college tuition increases, $2M isn't going to buy much.[/quote]

Have you had this discussion with your husband? Maybe you can set up a trust for each of your grandkids to pay for their college and graduate school tuition and other educational expenses.  The will could be like "for each of my grandchildren, including those not yet born, I grant $2 million," or something like that, and revise the number throughout the years.  I think you could ask the trustee to invest the money into the stock market (S&P 500) and then the money will go further.

That said, I think you've probably raised your children well, so they'll probably be able to set up their own kids for tuition, etc., on their own.  Do you have any reason to doubt that they won't be able to provide for their own families without your help?  Obviously as a mother, and future grandmother, you'd like to help by doing more.  But perhaps all is not dire if you don't.[/quote]

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