Reply to Can someone explain to me why so many on here would never remarry?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Male here, there’s no need. At 58 I’ve launched my kids who are all doing very well so I have the family I want and the odds are high that someone else’s family has a problem child or two and I don’t need that. I have a very high NW and getting married would require a prenup and I don’t need the hassle. I have plenty of female companionship and I’m happy to spoil them with travel etc but I’m free to do my own thing at any time. At the same time lightening could strike but there are a lot of boxes that would need to be checked before I got married again. [/quote]

+1 Man here and this is similar to my situation. I'm 54 with a net worth north of $14M (even after my divorce) and have two launched "normal" kids who are doing great. I'm in good shape, cycling several hundred miles a week and very independent. I spend time between my house in Arlington and my two vacation houses both alone, with my kids, friends, and female companions. I just don't see myself ever getting married again. Not sure what I would gain from it. I'm very content. I have had two longer term girlfriends, and it was fun for a while. They were attractive with successful careers. We traveled a lot, shared a lot of experiences and had a lot of sex but both eventually started talking about marriage and I just wasn't interested, despite them saying they would sign an airtight pre-nup (without me even asking about it). In the end, I just like my independence and frankly I think I was getting bored. I don't want someone trying to "change" me. I'm sure there are women out there in the same situation. [/quote]

I am one of the PP females (NW at 45 over $5mm, will be around $7mm at your age). I think all these answers are evidently showing the consumerism based attitude to relationship. Instant gratification and give nothing in return. All men would say their GFs are attractive, young, successful etc. But none of them say they were in love with any of their partners, experienced a companionship, truly enjoyed that person being next to them every day.

I had an 18-years marriage which unfortunately ended in exH adultery, and he's still very bitter about me ending it. But it didn't make me bitter, or stop believing in love and companionship. We were inseparable for the first 15 good years, and never did we experience this level or resentment or desire to be left alone. I still miss spousal sex.

Nothing is forever or can be 100% predicted in life. Most people are transactional and truly lost the ability to feel anymore. If I meet someone who gives me this sense of "relative-like" closeness, butterflies, sexual satisfaction and becomes my best friend, I would consider it a great luck, even if it only lasts a few years. I'm too wealthy to seriously consider my exH social security as reason not to remarry.

And  I did met several giving, kind, and successful men on OLD who  were marriage material. Those who want and look for relationship material find it. [/quote]

PP guy here. Well I was in love with my ex-wife, enjoyed her companionship, loved waking up to her everyday, etc that is until she slept with her law firm partner boss. In hindsight, clearly all was not well with our marriage, I was naive, and didn’t see it coming. She was two years younger than me when we divorced in our early 40s so I wouldn’t say she was “young”. And beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and I thought my ex-wife was attractive. Also she was hit on by guys so I’ll let you be the judge.

As far as my girlfriends go post-divorce, I think they are attractive and that’s all that matters (Note: my guy friends also think they are attractive as well). Almost all of them were not very young, more like 5-10 years younger than me so early to late 40s. When you have a high NW, are in shape, and socialize in certain circles you can be selective. I’m just not looking for marriage and most of my girlfriends aren’t either. I can have almost all the good things that comes with a marriage without being married.  And I think I have a pretty good gold digger detector as those types are definitely out there.[/quote]

You sound still bitter and should have forgiven her sleeping with another man. It's not the end of marriage: it was a signal from you to work on something in that marriage. Maybe she just got bored by routine: did you consider giving yourself or her a hall pass? 
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