Reply to Why do some women think it's acceptable to get engaged without a ring?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The olds’ hypocrisy of “The man proposes with a diamond ring on bended knee after getting permission from her father” but “I am a proud feminist” simply cannot die off soon enough.

Gag.[/quote]

Has any of the women here who expects a ring identifiex herself as a feminist?[/quote]

I don't know how they could. Feminism is about having choices and honoring the choice. Expecting a proposal and an engagement ring is anti-feminist even when it's a role reversal - their expectation is that a man will meet the expectation of gendered role simply because he's male. It's definitely contrary to feminism.[/quote]

I expected a ring and consider myself a feminist for sure.  Feminism is absolutely about a woman’s freedom to live her life the way she chooses, to vote and get an education just as any man could, to be president or a SAHM.  It doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate the differences between the sexes, both in terms of biology and society.  Seems like we disagree on what feminism is.

I don’t care one bit if a woman wants a ring or not, but I do hope in these situations it’s not a woman wanting a ring and going along with not getting one to keep her guy or appear like a cool girl.  I particularly love the greenhouse story.[/quote]

Yep, get your ring, your greenhouse, your house downpayment, but get SOMETHING![/quote]

Greenhouse poster, clarifying something.  I didn't demand a greenhouse from him, or ask for anything.  I'm not into jewelry, I don't even wear a wedding band, so that was already off the table. We had talked about it and agreed to be married before.  We had purchased a house together and did the renovations, Most of his free time was spent in reno, as I was busy with school and work.
One of DH's love languages is gifts, and he wanted to do something to mark the occasion so he built the greenhouse as a surprise. In return, I made his favorite dinner and dessert which we ate in the greenhouse, and talked about what we should try to grow and if we should spring for a DJ at the wedding, which was held in our backyard.

I'm very much in the camp that each couple should do what's right for them and not judge other couple's for what they choose todo. I also believe the engagement starts the moment you both agree to be married, and your commitment to each other should start before that[/quote]

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