Reply to Would you pay 200K for a baby that isn't biologically yours?

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "Would you pay 200K for a baby that isn't biologically yours?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I can speak to this. I’ve done 6 rounds of IVF with OE and 2 with DE and have never had success. I have one final DE embryo remaining and if it does not work, my journey will be over. I have never considered using a surrogate simply because I can’t afford it.

The vast majority of women will never be in my position, so they really can’t know how they would or would not react.

Nobody makes these decisions all at once. It happens bit by bit and as you go through the process, your heart aches more each time, you feel “wronged” a little more each time, and the sunk costs become more and more of a propellant to keep you going in the hope that you will finally succeed and it will have been worth it.

My DH and I did pursue adoption midway through this journey. We realized that it would be more expensive, more heartbreaking, and more ethically complicated than the path we already were on, so we went back to IVF.

Of course I’m sad that any child we potentially might have will not be genetically related to me. Then again, who is to say my genetics are so hot? After all, I’m infertile.

To me, the opportunity to raise a child, love them, and help them flourish seems like the greatest privilege there is. I hope I can be a part of that. The joy would outweigh the sadness of not having a genetic link to my child.

I wouldn’t wish this heartache on my worst enemy. I may end up with nothing to show for it except a lack of a retirement fund and a whole lot of tears. For those of you who cannot help but judge, please remember that nobody WANTS to make these choices. We are always choosing the least bad option that we feel we can live with. After so much pain, at least I won’t be left with any regrets about what more I possibly could have done. I hope you all count your blessings. [/quote]

Why do you say adoption is more expensive? It is essentially free through your local child welfare agency. And sometimes the state even pays you! [/quote]
Are these healthy kids?[/quote]

In some.states, like Maryland, emphasis is on family reunification,.which is great but doesn't led to as many adoptions of younger kids. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics