Reply to SIL asked us to take her kids overnight

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP is sooo busy with her own kid and her own life and couldn’t possibly find the time to help her family out - yet she has plenty of time to write a novel on an anonymous chat board and bash them.

You’re just a mean person, OP.  That’s the bottom line.  [/quote]

OP here. They are not my family. They are my son's and husband's family. I can count on one hand the amount of time he's seen them in the last 2 years. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and 3 birthdays. That's it. And you're right, I don't like them for a number of reasons. BIL is an alcoholic and has had multiple DUI's over the last 10 years. He doesn't put his kids in carseats half the time. I have zero interest in supporting them getting hammered for the evening and waiting for them to come pick the kids up when they're hungover. And I know, I will get flack for not taking these kids in with alcoholic parents.

They are coming to us because MIL dropped their regular support of childcare. We're not "helping them out", they have plenty other options like BIL's mom or one of SIL's friends.

I guess what I don't understand is DCUM's groupthink that you have to bend over backwards for family, even family that you don't like or spend time with often. [/quote]

They are your family through marriage.  Ok, we get you don't like them and don't want to help.  But, you do clearly have plenty of time.[/quote]

You just ignored every valid reason op gave for wanting nothing to do with this. You keep repeating that op hates them like someone with dementia. I know what you are like. I am older and am the mom who got taken advantage of by the other moms and relatives. I took the high road for far too long. The people who got angry when I said no, like you pp, were the takers. They can't live without knowing there is someone to take up their slack and they are never honest about how much they do not do for others.  You get insecure when you hear a former martyr say no more because people like you can't live without the doormats.[/quote]

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