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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]PP, found the info re: the kids & finding out, but how are they question stands. So sorry you are all going through this, OP. My ex had an affair and left, so I'm divorced. It has not been great for the kids but neither was the anger, criticism, gaslighting 100% of the time. I do my best with the 50. I do think it is easier for me, my ex was a very smooth liar (a litigator) and it was a relief to not have that in my home. Best to you, OP![/quote]

Mine left me for his affair partner too. He’s a gaslighter and a liar and a coward. These are facts. Emotions are still clouding how I feel about him - I loved him more than I have ever loved anyone, including myself. But I’m hoping in time that what I know to be true starts to inform my emotions and I no longer feel so devastated about our marriage ending. I’m focusing on what is important to me so that I feel good about myself and I don’t feel like my husband leaving me is due to some shortcoming of mine. The truth is he’s the one with shortcomings and I have no doubt at all that he’ll leave his affair partner in about ten years. It’s his pattern. And then he’ll be in his mid 60s, totally dependent on viagra, bald and groaning every time he has to lean over and tie his shoes. And I’ll be better in ten years than I am now.[/quote]

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