Reply to Running moms ragged with Teacher Appreciation right before Mother’s Day

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is the real issue for so many here a strange fear that other parents (moms) will gossip meanly about you if you don’t do anything for your kid’s teachers or school? I really think it’s the latter and damn, you are pathetic to get this degree of upset about any of this crap. Because I don’t understand all of these agonies otherwise. If people actually ask what you’re doing for staff or teacher appreciation day or week or month or year, you really can’t smile brightly and say something bland and avoidant about how great the school is and move on, and mentally start planning how you and DH are going to catch up on Barry tonight and when you’re next on vacation or whatever little pleasant thing you can call up to focus on?

It’s not about the burden or teaching being a “Women’s” profession in history or current day. It’s really just a choice to feel burdened by a bullshit obligation so that you feel you’re part of the horde. It’s pointless. Do it freely and happily or do none of it, don’t force your kids or DH to participate. It’s meaningless. If you can afford a significant donation to the PTA for art or music supplementation that’s one thing. If you can’t, raise your kids so that they can handle school to the best of their and your ability. No one wants to deal with your “exceptional” “spirited” “future leader” and no Starbucks gift card or a banner or whatever other bit of tedium will make up for being a loser parent to a PITA kid. [/quote]

Anytime holiday gifts for teachers, appreciation week, end of school gifts, etc. is brought up on here, the thread dissolves into calling parents that don’t gift or participate lazy, cheap, not caring about their kids, not caring about school, uninvolved, incapable, and so on.  So yeah, it is pretty safe to assume these same sentiments are said or thought about those that are not participating in the gifting IRL.  Which is why so many women feel heavily obligated and burdened to participate, even if they don’t want to- they care how they are perceived.  Clearly there are a lot of people/women out there that do feel like the gifting is not optional and anyone not participating is beneath them.  That is the biggest part of the problem.  The secondary one is letting go of what people think. [/quote]

I mostly agree, but part of this is that most parents genuinely want to participate in efforts to support teachers. It's not "pathetic" to want to show support. But I agree with the OP's point that it is too much. Honestly, the entire end of the school year for elementary school, starting with teacher appreciation week and continuing with various school day activities leading up to summer vacation, are stressful and overwhelming for most working mothers. [/quote]

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