Reply to How to explain to Ils that parents don’t want to share Christmas

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your parents are selfish and ridiculous.  When you get married, families blend with each other.  Your in-laws have the same rights as your parents as far as holidays, visiting, seeing grand children.  You need to tell your immature parents to grow up.[/quote]

Marriage doesn't mean your spouse's parents and your parents are family to each other now.  Mine don't speak to each other unless they are in the same room which has been maybe a handful of times in 2 decades. [/quote]

Then yours are dysfunctional.  Holidays are a time to bring people together.  OPs parents sound selfish to demand the other set of parents not be there.  If they wanted to be that anti social, they should just visit at another time. [/quote]

You are wrong and rude. My parents and his parents are entirely different people, from different cultures, speak different languages and live life differently. They don’t dislike each other but wouldn’t cross paths otherwise or be friends naturally. I think that’s pretty typical of a multicultural society not dysfunctional. In social settings They’d greet each other and then each talk to their own side of the family. Its awkward and uncomfortable trying to juggle both sides for us. It’s ok to not want to host that every holiday. It’s ok to only want to see one side of the family at a time too. [/quote]

None of this matters. You're just justifying why you can't be bothered to have all your family -and they are all your family- together for a single day. It's weird. It's not "typical of a multicultural society" (my grandparents were immigrants). It's divisive.

Man, Americans really are selfish people. This becomes more vivid to me with every passing day. [/quote]
Both sets of grandparents socializing is not very common, and never has been. It's not the default in most other cultures, either.

My parents and my wife's parents have maybe interacted less than 20 times over 20 years of marriage. They live over 1,000 miles apart, as one major factor. [/quote]

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