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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This thread is so DCUM.

The obsession with control. Thinking g you can tell your partner who they can and can't have sex with.

Are you a puppet master?

Laughing at all of the people stating their partner never cheated on them. At least half of you are wrong. [/quote]

No one put a gun to their head when they took their vows and my man asked me to marry him. Maybe he just shouldn't have. Yes, your comment is typical DCUM.[/quote]

Who includes fidelity in their vows? What are you, 100 years old?

No one cares about vows. It's just something you say. Theater. [/quote]

NP and honestly no at this point in my marriage I agree with you. I grew up thinking cheating was morally wrong and there’s no exception to that. If you cheat, you’re the bad guy no matter what. Fast forward to my marriage, my DH is dismissive, critical, unkind, talks down to me, and refuses to do an ounce to keep our household running. Yes, I’ve thought about divorce many times. I don’t leave because of finances and the kids. There’s recently been someone who caught my eye, who is attractive and kind to me. Most DCUM would day if your marriage is that bad, work on it or just divorce. It’s never as easy as that, ever. All I’m trying to say is things are never so black and white. My DH had probably never had an affair but his vows, to PP’s point, were theater. He doesn’t love, honor, and cherish me. If I were to have an affair because I need a break from the constant trauma of DH’s treatment of me, I refuse to believe I’d be the bad guy. [/quote]

But why would you want to go back to your spouse then? And why would you lie to your spouse about the cheating or tell them they are wonderful in bed and with what they do and all the things cheaters do? Cheaters don't just cheat in the bedroom. They cheat with their words to their spouse. I think you haven't done anything with him because you honor yourself. Cheating really isn't as much about honoring the other person as honoring yourself. This is why genetics and upbringing come into play. Because if you honor your own values, you won't cheat.[/quote]

PP here. Your response doesn’t align with or address what I stated. I have not had an affair. I said this other person caught my eye. I haven’t “gone back to my husband and told him he’s great in bed.” That is you putting words in my mouth and attributing actions to me that have not actually occurred. I have honored my spouse with the commitment I made on my wedding day to love honor and cherish. He has not. When you call me names in front of our young childrenC you have broken your vows. So don’t continued trying to beat the morality drum, which is so important to you. Your morality in the understanding of my situation is misinformed and misguided. [/quote]

You are responding to hypothecal questions from me. Not accusations. I thought that was obvious. What i was saying was that you likely wouldn't bend your morals just because someone else did. You completely missed the point of the post.[/quote]

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