Reply to What percentage of men cheat?

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Reply to "What percentage of men cheat?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Also turning this around, if your spouse was cheating would you all of a sudden decide to be abusive to deal with your spouse's cheating? I guess I could see it as a one-time thing if things started getting out of control and you didn't realize you were capable of doing that and acted on impulse, but after the one time, wouldn't you check yourself? Same for cheating. Anyone who continues to be abusive is just justifying their behavior. Not just reacting to chaos.[/quote]

Maybe for the same length of time the affair occurred.  3-years of cheating=3 years of abuse.  LOl  :lol:

It seems the betrayed are expected to hear something major like this and be over it in a day.  Trauma doesn't work like that and the longer the affair went undiscovered and number of times they were together is going to very much impact the level of trauma.

I'm not saying abuse is okay, but expecting someone to not snap or say something nasty or have very major trust issues as they work through their life having been one big lie and turned completely upside down and they don't know what was real in the past or real now and they are looking at every time you said you were somewhere...were you really there, etc., etc.  is one hell of a big ask.[/quote]

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