Reply to reality check please - husband who sometimes forgets to lock the front door at night

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DH did this for years. No matter how upset I got or how much I explained how important it was for me to feel safe at night knowing the doors are locked, he couldn’t make the effort because it wasn’t important to him. We’re getting divorced. [/quote]

I feel like this is my life. Can you share more?[/quote]

Sure. It didn’t matter that his refusal to reliably lock the doors made me feel dismissed, not listened to, not valued, or like a nag for bringing it up when he failed to do it and I came down in the morning and found our doors unlocked and got upset. This was just one of many examples of this type of disregard. If something wasn’t important to him, it wasn’t important at all. [/quote]

But if it was that Important to you, why didn’t YOU solve the problem? [/quote]

When your spouse repeatedly says you are doing/not doing something that is a really big issue for them and is causing them stress, do you say “that sounds like your problem to solve” or do you consider how your behavior is affecting them?  :roll: [/quote]

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