Reply to If all your siblings went on vacation without you, would you be hurt?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everyone saying it’s too expensive- maybe, but shouldn’t OP let her sister decide that for herself?[/quote]

Honestly I think OP is fine to not invite the sister. Skiing is in fact not a great activity when you have little kids. They also have a 5 month old which is different even than a 2 year old because they are intensely tied to sleep schedules at that point. A 5 month old would be great on a trip to paris where you are walking around and they snooze in and out, but skiing is time consuming. In the time it takes you to get all your gear on and to the slopes baby is ready for a nap again. So an adult would be required to be in the house 100% of the time caring for the kid and OP is right that the other parent would not be able to fully manage the other three. The trip would be miserable for the 3rd sister's family. Or sister or husband trade back just doing whole days at the house while the other teaches the other two kids. Anyway, there are ways I guess but this wouldn't be relaxing and I totally understand OP not wanting to deal with it. Although I think the 'have to be quiet after bedtime' thing is kind of bs unless the house is tiny and it is not tiny if it is even semi feasible to house the four sisters and their respective broods. I have had babies in plenty of group houses, even when they were waking at night, and you just get up and promptly deal with it.

THAT SAID, the issue here is not really that OP doesn't want to deal with all of that on a special ski trip she has saved up for, which is, again, in my opinion completely understandable.

The issue is that OP badly wants to invite sister four, and the fact that she can't without hurting three's feelings is making her feel resentful of three. But OP, you have resounding consensus here that the hurt three will feel will be warranted. It sounds like you and one will have a great trip. Why be greedy? Find another way to celebrate with four. It seems like three cannot win here at this point. If you don't invite four you will resent three for being the reason you can't do that and if you do invite four and three is hurt you will resent her for that too. That is unfair. A lot of your posts seem to imply that you feel you have done enough 'service' for three via caring for her children that you have 'earned' this vacation without her. That is also unfair, and a dangerous feeling to allow to fester in your heart. [/quote]

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