Reply to no 2nd child because DH won’t support SAH?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Am I the only one who thinks OP’s husband sounds like an a-hole?

I am an (Asian) woman who chooses to work even though we could live happily on my DH’s income. I enjoy having a job, and it’s a pretty flexible job so I feel like I have enough time with my kids. My husband supports me working, but he would equally support me SAH (I know because he’s asked me a few times if I would want to - obviously my life would be easier if I did!) I think it’s terrible for a spouse to make the other spouse work if they are financially set for college and retirement!

Of course, I’m sure my DH would respect me less if I became a stereotypical brain-dead SAHM, but if I continued to take an interest in the world, community, etc. I don’t think our relationship would suffer.[/quote]

Nope. If my husband would come home and informed me that he'd like to quit his job and, surprise, I need to 100% support our family I'd kill him. And we have serious $ coming in from both sets of parents and I already have a fully paid, nice house on my name and we can live on my salary alone.[/quote]
[b]I (female) would personally be happy,[/b] assuming I was making enough for us to be comfortable. Who wouldn't want an easier life? Who wouldn't want to never do laundry or cook dinner since you're working anyway? Who wouldn't want to be able to stay out for work dinners or travel without any guilt? Who wouldn't want to know the person who loves your child most is always on call for them? It's a sweet set-up for both parents.[/quote]

You (female) may personally feel this way, but I guarantee you that 99% of SAMs on this board do not.  That’s what is so grating:  the 100% inability to treat a DH the way they want to be treated by their DH, i.e., complete violation of the golden rule.  Everyone knows that having two little kids is hard for a while; it’s the next 20-30 easy SAHM years that are resented.  Duh![/quote]

You are completely talking out of your ass with this.  I can “guarantee” (at least inasmuch as you apparently can) that the vast majority of Dads don’t WANT to stay home, not to take care of the kids full time, not to take care of the house full time.  Working is not a sacrifice to them compared to the homefront, they PREFER it!  And some of us married real men, (not whiny, petulant, score-keeping man-babies) the kind who take pride in providing for their family and wouldn’t dream of demanding that the mother of their children work for money they don’t need when she would prefer to mother their children!  Some of you sound like you have married complete losers and justify their loser behavior by pretending it’s about equality.[/quote]

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