Reply to I definitely said a lot of racist & problematic things in the 90s

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]POC here- yep, I went to school with people like OP- they were incredibly commonplace. I hope you’ve reflected on how horribly you treated others. [/quote]

This is the thing. No matter how ”normal” it was to be that way, you were harming people the whole time. You didn’t notice it it, but they always noticed. You are in all of their stories. Now just picture OP multiplied by everyone like OP, thoughtlessly dehumanizing people and reaping the benefits of being favored. It is shocking how many middle aged white people have no idea how many people they hurt or gained an unfair advantage over. without even knowing. Learning  is the only path forward. [/quote]

I think this is such an important point. Even if you hurt somebody by accident, that person is still hurt and has to suffer the consequences of your ignorance. Yes it’s absolutely vital that we hold space for growth and don’t shame people, but that doesn’t mean that those who have been hurt are automatically healed. People have this expectation that once we apologize for hurting others, they are obligated to forgive us and pretend like it never happened. They don’t. Ans that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t try to do better. We just have to recognize that doing better doesn’t fix everything. [/quote]

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