Reply to Are single people in their thirties really the “undesirables”?

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Reply to "Are single people in their thirties really the “undesirables”?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I think its more, people who marry earlier tend to have matured earlier.[/b] They are making high incomes and can hold down jobs, they are emotionally mature and can sustain a deep connection with another, they have the tools to function in a relationship and make big decisions with another person in mind.

Many people arrive at this later. The people I know who married later in life had a longer "figuring themselves out" period. Men AND women.

The men are usually immature and do not have a career or life goals figured out. The women have low self esteem and keep running after jerks. Finally something clicks and they arrive at the alter the way their mentally more mature peers did earlier.[/quote]

This could not be further from my own experiences. There may be some outliers, but in my experience it is the most immature people who have the narrowest world views who marry at young ages. Of the 5ish people I know who married right after college, it was very clearly a way to have something and someone "known" while going out into the scary real world; 2 years was the record for these Mulligan Marriages. A mature person would have acknowledged that the next few years would bring about many changes and they would have wanted to focus on career, friends, travel. DEFINITELY not my experience that these people who are marrying in their early 20s are high earners who have their shit together, quite the opposite. They also seem to be the ones who go on to have epic mid-life crisis where you have 40 year old men acting like frat bros looking to relive the "glory days" and desperate wine moms clamoring for "girls night!" so they can flirt and get handsy with the waiter. They settled and didn't get to have those fun experiences, so they'll look to recoup that time later. Very unflattering. I work with tons of high earning men and women and none of them were married at 25. Not one. They were definitely not immature and without life goals, in fact they were working REALLY hard in their 20s to set themselves up for for the best possible outcome for life down the road when they eventually did want to marry and start a family. [/quote]

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