Reply to Afraid I will get evicted because of my 4-year-old's tantrums -- what are my rights?

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Reply to "Afraid I will get evicted because of my 4-year-old's tantrums -- what are my rights?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The tantrums likely aren’t regularly happening during “quiet hours”, right? Your child should be sleeping during that time.

You could try the car thing: keep a blanket in the car, put on fleeces and hats, and run the heat.[/quote]

New poster. Cramming a tantruming child into fleece or coat and a hat, while the kid bucks and struggles, will make a tantrum just get worse. And someone passing by is going to see OP trying to shove a fighting, crying child into a car and probably will call the authorities....

Using a car as the tantrum spot or time out location also runs the risk of making the child eventually associate being in the car with being angry and unhappy, and that is NOT an association you want a child to have with the car that must take that kid to preschool, to the doctor, etc.

This is also why time out spots should not be a child's own bedroom. Either they'll start to think of the bedroom negatively, or conversely, they'll be glad to get time outs because time out equals bedroom time, and the bedroom is full of their toys etc. Neither of those is what a parent wants from time outs. [/quote]

Did you miss the part about OP living with her child (and another to come) in a tiny apartment? She refuses to move or accept that it’s not enough space for her children. Where else do you think timeouts can be, if not a car or bedroom?[/quote]

Hallway. Even a small apartment probably has one of those, no? Mom sits silently with the kid if kid won't stay put. No interaction, though. No toys or distractions in the bland hall. Very short time outs at this age . And it beats dragging a yelling child outside, where the tantrum would get heard by the whole apartment complex, not just the one adjoining neighbor.

Also: OP is pregnant so maybe hauling her fighting toddler outdoors isn't exactly healthy for mom to be doing. Certainly it will be less of an option with each passing week as OP gets bigger. The "take DC to the car" option wouldn't work for long even if it did make sense.

OP really needs to find distractions that can break the tantrum cycle and divert DC enough to distract DC before tantrums get full-blown and super loud. If she's going to remain in an apartment she needs some techniques I'm sure exist in the many parenting books parents talk about on DCUM.

She and her spouse do need to get a handle on noise sooner rather than later, but the neighbor also fails to realize this is apartment living and most of all, this will pass. Those posting here about how OP just needs to move are, as a PP noted, spoiled. Families with young children live in apartments all over the world and right here in this area too. Unless the child is disrupting the limited, official quiet hours regularly, the neighbor is not being a neighbor at all. Once the baby is here, this neighbor is going to kick up a fuss if the baby cries in the night like...a baby.

It occurs to me that if the OP had posted on a DCUM schools thread about how she was staying put in a difficult living situation in order to ensure her kids the best possible school in a few years' time, on a thread like that, the responses likely would tell her she was doing the right thing and that location at the cost of space and annoying neighbors is worth being in the boundary for a good school, etc. But here she's getting "Just move already!" attitude. If she could move to a single family home in this school district, surely she would. If she could move to a SFH in another decent district, surely she would. Wagging fingers at her because she won't move is not helpful. [/quote]

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