Reply to Wife chronically depressed, blames everyone everything for her unhapiness&unfullfillment, I want out

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Reply to "Wife chronically depressed, blames everyone everything for her unhapiness&unfullfillment, I want out"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I try to encourage her to get help, to stay active, to be active, helpf her find a new job, and so forth and so on.

Everything is miserable, everything is doom and gloom, no motivation,

We have 2 young kids, I don't want ot do this anymore. My formerly vibrant, engaged, alive, spouse is a dead shell of a person. A financial, emotional drain and burden. I do not say these things lightly; as I am aware of the weight they carry.

I am blamed for so much. It is everyone else's fault (mine primarily) as to why she is not doing well. She does not have support, encouragement, things to look forward to etc----and this is partly why she says she is depressed. I do not think that it is up to other people to manage your feelings and actions. If you do not work to find that drive within you, you will always be searching for it, and blaming everyone else along the way.

If i try to Help her by seeking out an activity to do together, she says that I am not hearing her, and missing the point. That an activity isnt going to help what she is feeling. Nothing is helpful, nothing is right, nothing is positive. I cannot continue on in this way.

She has become critical of my looks, and the weight gain I have experienced in recent years due to a medical condition. While I agree about getting healthier, I am resentful of her focus on critcizing me, when she is currently a completely dysfunctional person, adding basically nothing to our household for the last 18 months. No steady work, no picking up slack at home, etc.

I do not enjoy being around her anymore. When she is not blaming me for various things wrong in her life, she is staring into space, or sleeping. INvovlment with the children is minimal. Keeping up with the house is minimal. I am carrying the family and would rather do so alone, rather than with this negative, sick, angry, sad person occupying space here. I repeat- I do not say these things lightly. This has been a long road and I am simply tired.[/quote]

So you don’t encourage or support here because you believe that is up to individuals to do for themselves?

Is your medical condition a mental health or neuro one?

Is this her passive aggressive way of getting you to divorce her? Or vice versa?
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