Reply to First X-Mas as blended family off to terrible start

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]29 is old enough to be cordial, but if I were one of the adult kids in this situation...it’s hard to even begin to articulate how awful it would be to see your dad start over with a new wife and new baby. You made the choice to have this complicated family dynamic. The adult kids did not choose to lose their family of origin.[/quote]

This.  As a 29 year old, reading this makes me want to cry.  I can’t imagine losing my mother and then having my dad start a new family.[/quote]

The mother in this case has been dead for many years. It's a bit selfish of you to go on building your life but expect dad to stay unattached forever.  It's not like you're there to keep him company![/quote]

The parents were already divorced before the mom died.

But anyway, there is a difference between getting remarried and getting remarried and having a new kud a generation younger than an existing set.[/quote]

This.  I'm the 29 year old PP.  I wouldn't expect my father to remain single forever and I'd like to think I'd welcome a new partner into the family...but another baby three decades younger than me would be so hard.  [/quote]
Why?
No one is asking you to raise him/her[/quote]

I can’t fully articulate why.  I’d probably feel replaced and like my siblings and I weren’t “enough” for him.  I’d be concerned that he wouldn’t have enough time for me and my kids.  I’ve always been my dad’s baby and I’d grieve the end of that.  It would be disorienting to see my dad as a peer parent rather than the big strong authority figure I grew up with.  I’d be embarrassed to tell people I have a sibling younger than my own kids.[/quote]

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