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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As an alternative perspective- my husband is the father of 4 girls and he often uses the hashtag #girldad when captioning pictures of things he never imagined he would be doing like posing for a picture with Elsa because our daughter was too shy or letting our youngest put nail polish on him. He is relishing the experience and loves it. I don’t think anyone views him as being defensive or jealous? [/quote]

That’s because he’s not using it to excuse bad behavior.[/quote]

I think attitudes like this are the reason for the need for “boy moms.”  Some people just seem to interpret everything boys do as “bad.”  [/quote]

Not at all. My girls play with the boys down the street all. the. time. Seventy percent of the time, things are great; 10 percent are hiccups they figure out on their own; 10% is me refereeing if my girls are out of line; and 10% is the boys hitting or name-calling, and the other mom excusing her ALL BOYS.

Bad behavior is bad behavior and needs to be addressed, full stop. If you excuse it because #BOYS, you suck.

And I have friends whose kids are boys who don't excuse or #ALLBOY it, and I appreciate that they address their kids' behavior.[/quote]

I disagree that bad behavior is bad behavior.

At my son's 1st school bad behavior was climbing trees, wrestling on the playground, hitting each other with sticks, getting in the pond, trash talk, throwing snowballs.

We moved him to an all boys school and none of those behaviors were bad behaviors. Hitting  and name calling is not always bad behavior.[/quote]

I feel you.  [b]I was down at the school the other day because my fourth grader got into trouble for not coloring his math project.  He doesn’t like to color.  It wasn’t art class.  Isn’t there any other way to teach fourth grade math?  I am going to stand up for his right to not have to color everything with crayons anymore.  It was one thing in kindergarten, but he is 9 years old now.  [/b] [/quote]

Are you not going to give the teacher the benefit of the doubt that there was a reason for the math project to be colored? Even if he doesn't like to color, he still needs to do the work he's assigned. I didn't like math but my mom never  "stood up for my right to not do math". In fact, I also didn't like art, but the expectation was that I followed directions and completed assigned assignments at school whether I liked it or not. You're setting a bad precedent here, and your kid is going to suffer for it. Plus you completely undermined the authority of the teacher in the first week or so of school. Be prepared for your little prince to now feel empowered to do absolutely nothing he doesn't like or want to do since he knows you'll go in and "fix it" for him.  How is this going to work when he gets older and has to do something he doesn't like to do, like take certain classes or, you know, get a job?  [/quote]

This is a different discussion, but do you think you might have liked math if it had been taught a different way?  If it was obvious to your mom that you would have, do you think she should have intervened with the school or just let you think that you “don’t get” math or “don’t like” it?

[/quote]

To answer your question, no I don't think I might have liked math if had been taught in a different way. I was taught to use many different strategies by my teachers and my parents. They approached things in multiple different ways. I still didn't like it. It didn't come easy to me. It doesn't mean I didn't do the work. I worked harder because it didn't come as easy to me. I got Bs and Cs in math instead of the As I got in social studies and languages and worked twice as hard at math.  I didn't like art, either. I still went to art class in school every week because it wasn't a choice. Same with the "fun run" in PE. I hated that day. I still hate running. It wouldn't have mattered if the PE teacher had taught me how to run in a different way.  It doesn't mean that I should have gotten out of doing it because I didn't like it or wasn't good at it.

Continuing to work at things I wasn't good at or didn't like gave me a work ethic. If I had been allowed to quit everything I didn't like or wasn't good at, or if my parents had stepped in and undermined my teachers by telling them I shouldn't have to do things I didn't like or wasn't good at it, it would not have set me up to function well as an adult. There are all sorts of challenges in life and the road isn't going to be paved smooth for you by other people.  I didn't know then how important it was to persevere at things that didn't come easily to me, but it was very important in shaping me and I can appreciate that now. [/quote]

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