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[quote=Anonymous]OP, if you take the emotions out of this, the most sensible thing to do is go to the wedding with your toddler for the weekend. Then, in the spring when the baby is older, all of you plan a trip to visit your family. This way you are there to support your brother, your family gets to see the toddler, and your wife gets to recover at home with the newborn. If your DW won't budge on the toddler going with you to the wedding, then you go solo and explain to your family that they will be able to see both kids in the spring. At some point you and DW need to address her mistrust of your family, but I'm not sure this is the time or the context in which to do it. [/quote]
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