Reply to Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had my daughter when I was 17. In hindsight, it was a difficult experience, it changed the trajectory of my life and it made me have to grow up super fast. Also fun? Killed my relationship with my parents and I got to learn very quickly how useless and terrible my boyfriend was.

That's the bad.

Now, the good. When I decided to have my daughter, I made a point to spend the entire pregnancy getting myself in a place to support my daughter and myself. I got my GED quickly. I enrolled in a speedy LPN program, and by the time my daughter was three months old, I got two full time jobs. I worked my ass off, I hustled for support including working nights and weekends so I could do as much childcare as possible. My mother had a hard time with things, but saw the changes in me and fell in love with my daughter.

I eventually cut one job down and enrolled in a RN program at NOVA. I finished it and was able to get an even better job. that paid for my BSN. I kept working, kept saving because my dream was to afford a home by the time DD turned 5 (before K). Thanks to the housing crisis, I was able to get afford a small townhouse that fed into an excellent pyramid. I still worked at the hospital and picked up extra shifts here and there to pay for things, but I've been independently supporting us for the past 10 years. My mother and father are still involved and around, but it isn't the pattern of grandma turning into mom. I'm the mother.

Now the amazing. DD is an amazing young woman. She's curious. She's funny. She's talented and kind and a bit shy. She is such a joy and parenting has been one of the hardest but worthy things I've ever done.

She's in high school now and I'm looking at an empty nest and it's strange because I'm so young. I could have another child, but I don't see that happening. I'd like to get my master's at some point, maybe become an NP. I'd like to travel. [/quote]

Your responsibility and grit is apparent. You sound like a loving and inspirational mom and I’m sure your daughter appreciates it all. I had a teen mom, but my own child after 5 years of marriage and I didn’t fully appreciate it all until that happened. [/quote]

Thank you. One thing I forgot to write is that there was so many resources out there to help me. That LPN program was sponsored by my high school and free. My baby was eligible for medicaid. I was able to get child care support and WIC when the baby was born and I wasn't working. I spent a good amount of time trying to figure out HOW I could do this and getting resources to support me while I was trying to get my life together.

And I won't lie. During the first two months, I had an either or plan. I was either going to have a plan to make this work and was able to get resources and support in place to make things happen or I was going to Maryland and getting an abortion. I'm relieved that at that time the resources were there to help me.

What scares me now is that there's a two sided attack. Cutting resources and supports for mothers who are struggling and then simultaneously making it more difficult to terminate a pregnancy because a woman can't support that pregnancy.

I wanted to add that caveat because I get a lot of see THIS is why someone shouldn't be able to have an abortion. You did it. I don't think that's the right point. I was able to choose this and I am happy I was able to, but there were many factors weighing on my choices.[/quote]

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