Reply to Van Lifer couple camping in Utah national park - two weeks later fiancee arrives in FL alone

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I will probably be trashed for this, but I wouldn’t vote to convict his parents for covering up for him. [b]They had no role in her death. 
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If it were your son, what would you do. Honestly ask yourself that.

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Make him be a man and own whatever he did. BL owes her family closure and to know what happened to their daughter. I’d walk with him to the police station to turn himself in. I’d also hire the best attorney I could to make sure he didn’t get the death penalty. Helping your child get away with murder is not what a parent should do. [/quote]

Here is the parents role in her death: they raised a psychopath and they brought Gabby into their home and had her live with them because they hoped Gabby would solve their Brian problem- the guy has No friends, no job and no prospects- except her. The Laundrie's used her

Then, when their son murdered her they callously obstructed the rightful search for her. Doesn't anyone notice the pattern of deception Brian is displaying the parents also display- learned at home.

They raised a psycopath[/quote]

First right now I don’t necessarily see that we have any information that would lead to them being convicted of anything. I guess it could go that way but it usually doesn’t in these cases. Most likely they will now submit to an interview with their attorney and do the minimum required to avoid obstruction charges. And unlike PPs I’m fairly unconvinced they had anything to do with BL’s trip back to FL or anything like that.

I talked earlier in here about extreme DV situation that honestly could have gone this way, but thankfully did not after an arduous journey and a lot of fear, close calls, escaping into another area of the country. In some cases these people manipulate their own families and they have a lifetime wealth of information on how to do it. Does that fully excuse the family, no, and statistically there are some factors like abuse and neglect that are more correlated with the development of these kind of personality traits. I honestly don’t know for sure every little thing that happened in my sibling’s abuser’s life, but I never got the sense their parents were the worst. I’m sure they could have done a better job educating their child in a way that is more highly correlated with developing pro social behavior, but that goes for a lot of parents. I know that they have other siblings that haven’t been accused of any DV.

There are some different risk factors and personality types for DV episodes. Some are more treatable with current “technology” than others. People who are highly manipulative are not very treatable, and typically will just use the information they glean from therapy sessions to better manipulate people. To be honest I’m not sure what would work with some of these narcissistic sociopathic personality types except maybe some sort of brain surgery that we don’t currently have. They will lie with no real purpose in mind just to see what they can get away or test the boundaries of how they can manipulate people.

There are definitely red flags but a lot of times the victim is in too deep pretty early on and that can go for their family too. These are the proverbial “wolf in sheep’s clothing” in many cases. Main reason is because most of us operate on the assumptions that people are more less interacting with the world the same way we are - that no one is perfect but most people are not trying to actively ruin other people’s lives every chance they get for no reason at all. People with highly narcissistic and sociopathic traits use all that to their advantage and kind of act as a puppet master in the lives of those surrounding them. I do think you can fall victim to these people easier than a lot of people think because once you start to catch on it’s hard to get your family member out. The lying and gaslighting is intense. They play people off each other. I have parents who could literally win awards they are such good parents, that have a healthy marriage and presumably never would have thought their child would almost be murdered by a maniac who walked into their lives.

I guess I’m not trying to be depressing and I HOPE this never happens to anyone here or their child. I truly, truly do. It’s so awful. But I do want to give the perspective maybe of Gabby’s family and that they were probably doing what they could but its not as straightforward as it might seem on the outside looking in. Even for the abuser family, they cut people off and then bring them back in as necessary.

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