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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Anyone think Gerry was an even bigger @ss to Leslie tonight? His saying he picked the woman who "knows how to nurture a relationship" seemed like a very mean dig at Leslie. He has a terrible mean streak imo and I completely believe he made that weight comment to his ex.[/quote]

Someone got mad when I said much earlier in the thread that Leslie’s spotty relationship history was a red flag.

Sorry, but if she has never been in a healthy, longterm relationship, who knows if she is capable if it. If that is what he seeks, Theresa at least knows the drill. [/quote]

Her husbands cheated on her, and broke her heart. Are you saying she somehow deserved that treatment? Because he attributed this to HER.[/quote]

She says she has never (despite two previous marriages) had someone treat her well, or commit to “until death do us part.” Seems odd for someone who has committed to marriage twice. At very least, her picker is off. [/quote]

It certainly is, if she had her vows ready for Gerry.

But really, I dislike the idea that if a woman didn’t luck out immediately with relationships, she’s doomed to be rejected forever…because she hasn’t had good relationships. See how it works? So Leslie’s first husband cheats, she’s hurt, the second one deems her a doormat because of that and cheats on her, and on and on. She’s never worthy of being treated well because she wasn’t treated well. Meanwhile Theresa met her husband as a kid and married him and they stayed married till he died. Maybe she’s easier to get along with, maybe she put up with more shit, maybe she was just luckier. It doesn’t make her more worthy of love.

Anyway, I like them both and think both deserve better than Gerry. I hope Theresa has a prenup. [/quote]

You sound defensive. No one said those with a challenging past deserves a challenging future. And no nice guy would  decide to treat someone like a doormat because her last partner did.

All I was saying is that one partner seems riskier, and less relatable for someone with his history. Not less  deserving.

I think you are identifying with Leslie. . [/quote]

+1.

Gerry was just trying to answer the question about what "clicked" for him during overnights.  He wasn't trying to shame Leslie, but it IS a comparative process.  So he HAD to look at what one person was like vs. what the other person is like, and then decide which one feels more in sync with his own experiences and goals.  He was fine with Leslie.  But, when [b]HE [/b]was with Theresa, it felt like a better match.  That's all he was saying.  By necessity it was comparative.  And I wish he had been more aloof in answering.  But, he was being honest about what differences mattered to him.[/quote]

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