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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I didn't say that I didn't value close family ties and supporting one another.  But I do not expect my kids to put their own lives on hold and neglect their own responsibilities in in order to take care of me when I'm old.   Don't get me wrong, I really hope that I get to see them at that stage of my life.  I'm pretty sure that they will want to see me.  Hopefully we can make that happen.
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NP. This is some warped way of thinking. How is taking care of a loved one amounts to "putting your life on hold"? It[i] is[/i] life. Unless you're orphaned/cut ties with family of origin, single, and childless. Again, it's a valid choice, and plenty of people enjoy it immensely. Maybe more people should consider it.[/quote]

It's not warped. It's simply a different cultural perspective from yours. In my family as well, as I saw from my great-grandparents, and my grandparents, my aged parents, and now for myself, we do not want to be a burden on our children or grandchildren. We want to live on our own and be as independent as possible, for as long as possible, and we want to end our years being as little trouble as possible. That doesn't preclude any of us stepping in and caring for our sick or dying elders with love and grace. We look at it with less entitlement all around. I suppose that's a basic difference between cultures that value independence and the individual versus cultures that push for hyper-dependence and putting the group over the individual.[/quote]

Interestingly, you are describing my point of view to a T. Frankly, I can't see where you read I feel entitled to anything. But no, I will not abandon my elderly parents despite the fact they don't want to be a burden.

America's time as a haven for individualists has been long gone. Americans do not value individuals over group anymore and raise their children helpless and hyper-dependent on others. (Although you are correct, not family.) As someone watching from sidelines, I can assure you, your perception of your country is warped.[/quote]

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