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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]Most people work bc they have to not because it gives their life meaning so it shouldn't be a surprise that your friends feel spending time with their kids is "living the dream".[/quote]

I make more money than my spouse, but neither one of us makes enough to support a family in this region - nothing but two full-time jobs would work for us and there hasn't been any money left over for nannies and au pairs.

I don't think it would have been better for my kids if I had been SAH - just different. I probably would have been terrible at it and I actually admire parents who can throw themselves into school volunteering, chauffeuring to 4:00 sports practices, cooking meals, spotless houses, maintaining strict bedtime routines, etc.  I'm kind of glad to have an excuse for not being good at any of that stuff!  (Yes, yes, I know most WOH moms somehow manage to do all that stuff and work full time but I am not one of those people). [/quote]

Having done it, it was extremely boring to me, once my kids started school.  It is really amazing to me that people yearn to stay at home with older kids, but if you work when your kids are small and come home for the second shift, I can see how some burn out.   [/quote]

Not the least boring for me.  My DH is retired so we are now both at home with our rising 4th grader.  During the school day, we are free to do whatever we like, golf, tennis, hiking, working out, dine out, shop, movies, volunteer, etc.  Our kid has a lot of activities during the week as well as a weekend activity that we travel all over the country for, usually at least one plane trip a month, while the other 2-3 weekends are local.  Doubtful most people would choose to work if they did not have to earn a living.  It is much more fun to stay at home with an older kid that's for sure!  [/quote]

I disagree. Your life sounds lovely minus the monthly plane ride (sounds awful) but not all of us want a life of leisure. I've worked hard for my career as has my spouse and we are committed to both family and career. My father retired a multimillionaire at 52 and chose to start a new company. Some people are driven to contribute and challenge themselves. Some people volunteer, true, you don't HAVE to have a career but not true that if given the chance all of us would give it up. [/quote]

DH and I are both [b]Ivy educated attorneys so we both had careers[/b].  We prefer our current life.[/quote]

It's not really career or no career for most of the PPs, from what I can tell.  I went to Harvard, and am a successful policy advisor in national security, but having gone to Harvard and my current line of work are just two data points, they don't really preordain that I will work for 40 years straight in the same field.  I find so many people on DCUM are hyper-formulaic in their approach to life, and think some magical algorithm applies to all decisions (if you stay home do it when they are young, if you make $250K, you are crazy to stay home...unless your spouse makes $1M, then see part C..., if you quit your job you will become a bitter shrew, if you don't stay home with your kids, they will never know you and will end up druggies)  It's madness, these assumptions!  Life is iterative, and making changes is all part of the fun if you are open to it.  [/quote]

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