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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Most Asian parents live frugally and save for their kids college and weddings. They also save for their own retirement.  So, it is all good.   Asian  families are close knit and help out each other.

I have no problems taking care of my parents or my ILs. They have supported us and now we are privileged to take care of them, because we love and respect our parents.

It is natural for parents, siblings, children to be very attached to each other and do whatever is necessary to help each other.  When we see a lack of such love and concern for family members in Western people, it is shocking to us. Its just that we have not seen or experienced such detachment among family members, and it seems very inhuman.  I am sure though, it feels normal to those who have not seen anything different. [/quote]
Abuse and incest are only expressions of love, right OP?

I sometimes visit a website "Mother-In-Law Stories" where women (and men) vent about their in-laws. I swear, 1/3 to 1/2 of the stories are written by Asian women - even if they do not call it out, it is evident from the circumstances of the story or from their writing style. They write how the in-laws oppress, sometimes abuse them, play mind games with their husbands, and sometimes are just plain nutty. Well, a " bad" American couple would disengage from a crazy or evil relative, but the Asian tradition requires a DIL to bow to them and she has no way out until she herself becomes a mother in law and can take it out on her DIL![/quote]

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