Reply to married to someone with a perfect education pedigree who has never lived up to the potential

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I feel like I'm in the same situation, with a DW who feels entitled to some sort of pampered dream-life, just because of the degree (translation in her mind: future paycheck) she married.

In our situation, HHI is $250K -- DW $90K DH ~$160K.  DH graduated from an excellent school, working for the government.  DW not driven career-wise - could certainly do more if she wanted to.  Hasn't really done so because of desire to be around for the kids.  Educational debt was completely paid off within first year of marriage, well over a decade ago and DW never really had to take any meaningful responsibility for that.

DW would say exactly the same things as OP, I'm sure.  I've often been told how much I disappoint her, how I haven't risen to my potential.  But I'm happy with what I'm doing; it's meaningful work.  Yes, it's busy sometimes -- but I'm able to spend AMPLE time with her and with the kids.  Sometimes the known, even at lower income, is better than the risk of the unknown, particularly when time off, work-life balance, and general job satisfaction are part of the equation.

I wish OP and my DW the best in their quest for inclusion in the 0.1% via marriage.  
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Did all this stuff come re DW's expectations come out after marriage, or did you have an idea before getting married? Not that it changes anything but I'm curious as to whether these women are the types who say -- oh honey I just want you to be happy, I love that you love your meaningful job -- before marriage, and then after marriage it turns into -- you know Jane's DH has the same degree as you and makes 250k, why don't you look around for other opportunities? Or are these wives giving hints when they're just girlfriends re -- your job is fine FOR NOW, but who knows what opportunities you'll have later -- i.e. opportunities paying more.[/quote]

I think the guys know. They know because they have married someone way out of their league - sound true at all? We knew a couple like that - the gal wanted a double the size diamond engagement ring after two years of marriage. She wanted to stay home with kid but have a nanny and maid and a Beamer too. He knew what he was getting himself into from the start....[/quote]

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