Reply to I've been unknowingly dating a transgender man

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Two things:

1) I've known a lot of trans women.  Maybe 20+ due to my work.  None of them would ever have entered into a relationship without disclosing this information much much sooner, particularly if they were pre-operative.  For that reason, I think there's an at least 50% chance that this is a troll thread - trans women live in actual fear of their lives and do not typically go around courting violence by entering into relationships with unknowing cisgendered men.

2) Assuming that OP encountered a trans woman with REALLY bad survival instincts and the story is true, then OP just needs to move on.  Yes, it was rude of the woman not to disclose her sex assigned at birth.  OP has a total right to not be attracted to someone with a penis.  He's not transphobic or a jerk for not wanting to date her anymore, but he is a jerk for wanting to spread her information around and put her at risk of violence.  [/quote]

1) If by troll you mean that I'm just a hater, no I don't hate trans people. And your statement about no trans women doing this does not appear to be true. From the research I have done this does happen.  It appears in many cases it ends in violence. I must admit though that I am quite ignorant on transgender matters and have been trying to educate myself more. She did share with me that she was bullied quite badly as a kid so I don't think she's a stranger to violence. If your statement about having bad instincts is true then I would say she falls into that category and probably needs help. Especially since I'm not the first. At some point in the next day or so when I decide to answer her calls, I will broach this subject with her. While I find it hard to imagine she is not plugged the "dos and donts" of the trans world, her actions make me concerned that maybe she's not getting good advice.[/quote]

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