Reply to If DH is a law firm partner, must I be the default parent?

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Reply to "If DH is a law firm partner, must I be the default parent?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes, unless you want your child to be brought up by a nanny. If that is the case, get a good one. And a great preschool also.[/quote]

This is exactly right.  As a law firm partner, his clients come first so by definition he cannot commit to any family obligations.[/quote]

So there are two solutions for his problem of child care for his child.

1. He can compromise.
2. He can tell OP that she has to compromise.

There are a lot of unexamined assumptions here.[/quote]

The thing is, he can't compromise.  The compromise is to get a nanny.  The law firm partner (assuming a top tier firm) is never going to be able to cancel a meeting to take a sick kid to the doctor or commit to show up at a play or sports game.  Once in a while it will work out, and the partner can come to a sports event or chaperone a field trip, but the other spouse or nanny has got to be there as a back-up if the partner suddenly has a big meeting come up.  Just the way it is. [/quote]

This just isn't true. My dad is a (litigation) partner at one of the top firms in DC, and when my brothers were in high school, came to every single Langley lacrosse game for four years running -- and he wasn't the only similarly situated team dad who did. I work in biglaw now and I see it all the time -- there are people who want to make it work with family, and those who don't. It's not always perfect, but nearly all the time, it's a personality and priorities question, not a job issue.[/quote]

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