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[quote=Anonymous]I would distance myself for now from the friend. I say “for now” bc you’ve only cut AP off already so maybe part of you doesn’t want to cut her out of your life forever

Remind yourself that it’s HER job to tell her DH. You want DH to hear about it from her, not you.

Keeping your distance is also practical measure. When things hit the fan, she’ll be texting and calling her closest friend 24/7 about and that won’t be you. It’s ok to occasionally listen, say you’re sorry and that really really sucks, and let her talk about what she thought was wrong w the relationship w DH, that she thought she was truly in love w AP etc. You DONT have to imply that you approve of her behavior etc

If you can, when it all blows up, maybe try to be there for *her kids* and offer a sheltering place to hang out, do homework, have dinner. For her kids sake and yours, since they’re friends. I’d be mentally saving my energy for this part. I’d also have to think carefully about what not to say (you could just stick with the fact that you’re really sad and they’re welcome at your place). Don’t say anything that can be remembered later as you judging, hating, or manipulating their relationship w their mom etc. It’s possible your friend is self-centered enough that she will perceive this as you being supportive of her and that will be enough. You could even tell her that you’ll be there for her kids bc they’re such good friends w yours, but you can’t get more involved, make sure they get to a therapist etc.[/quote]

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