Reply to single income family/ SAHM major disadvantage

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it is possible to have a single family income and SAHM but that requires a lot of lowered expectations. 
No private school, almost no eating out, almost no vacations, hand me down clothing, etc...
The above is possible during the early years because who wants to take toddlers out to dinner or on vacation?

The sweet spot is to take advantage of full-time school to secure a part-time job. That would allow additional income to buttress the additional expenses of children's extracurriculars and the increasingly expensive family life.

SAHM-hood is great but gets awfully boring when the kids are late teens getting ready for college. 
Having a mom who works is inspirational for kids too and gives them a model for "can-do".
I have been both and, well, each family is different with different needs.[/quote]

You are correct.  Every family is different with different needs.  I have not yet found being SAHM/SAHW boring. [b]When I am SAH-grandma[/b],  I will not find that boring too.  How unevolved are you that you do not know what to do with your free time?  If you can find fulfillment only in doing routine 9-5 work...well, that's on you. You are certainly serving someone's interest.

As a SAHM (DH makes decent amount) - 
- we were able to afford a brand new SFH, 
- we ate out very frequently, 
- we had international vacations every year, 
- my kids had all the gear and clothes that they needed, 
- my kids went to magnet programs in public schools, 
- they got full merit scholarships in state college, paying peanuts to major in dual majors,
- we always had a twice-weekly cleaner, lawn company, part time chef
- we entertained a lot and had help to do that. 
- we had tutors and coaches for my kids, they had expensive ECs, and we travelled for the ECs, we could afford all the camps etc
- we have been able to save for all our needs - college, retirement, travel, kids weddings, kids cars, down payments for kids first condo etc.

Your kids need you even more in MS-HS years.  And once my kids went to college, we continued to provide support and input to them.  When you are a SAH grandmother, your kids may need you even more.

BTW - my DH is a very dedicated dad and as a SAHM, I made sure that all his free time was spent in spending time with the family, his hobbies, family travel, socializing, and family obligation.  I could buy back time for him because I took care of everything else.

I have been in both situations - SAHM and WOHM.  And no amount of outsourcing as a WOHM could make up for not having endless time with my children.  However, I absolutely find it valuable to outsource all chores (except child rearing) that you can so that you have more time to be valuable to your kids well-being and growth, even as a SAHM - if you can afford it.

Being a SAHM (rich enough to outsource some routine work and tap into resources to create opportunities for your family and yourself)  gives you and your family precious time.

Time is the only non-renewable resource in your life.  [/quote]
This... isn't a thing. [/quote]

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