Reply to It's official: Gen Z are not delaying marriage til 30s anymore, young weddings are cool again

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "It's official: Gen Z are not delaying marriage til 30s anymore, young weddings are cool again"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I got married at 23 and had my first at 26, in law school.  People acted like I was a teen mom.  It was ridiculous.  I’ve been married for 17 years and I’m really happy with my choices.  I have health problems now that could have kept me from having kids in my 30s.  So I’m really glad I got that done in my 20s and I would recommend for my children to do the same.

At the same time, I was fairly mature at 23 and knew what I wanted.  I knew DH was a good partner.[/quote]

I wish I could have had children younger. I don't see what the big deal is. Think of how young you'll be when the nest empties! [/quote]

I’ll be 46 and an empty nester MUAHAHAHA.

My 20s were hard but I’m happy DH was with me.  He is the one who put me through law school.  We had marriage, law school, babies overlapping and it was super hard but by my mid 30s life was so pleasant.  [b]Now nearing 40 my kids are older and I am really enjoying my life. [/b] I didn’t travel or date a lot but DH and I have had some fun trips while my parents stay with the kids.[/quote]

It always stands out to me that young parents seem thrilled to be empty nesters and “enjoying my life.” There is this mindset that you’re happy the phase of having kids is over with.

Did you not enjoy having kids?  
Perhaps you had to give up so much in your 20s and you feel like your time is finally your own?  I can imagine you had virtually no time to yourself and had to struggle through lawschool if you had young babies at the same time.

I can’t imagine viewing having a family the way you do.  I loved my time in my 20s and it’s now great to have a young family in my 40s. [/quote]
I'm not that PP, and I LOVE having kids, but I'm also not a martyr. No matter how much you love babies and little kids, it is a tiring time in life and there is some unpleasantness to it. I am glad to have been changing diapers and chasing after toddlers and doing 2am wakeups and carting around strollers and other gear when I was late 20/early 30s with energy galore than doing it now, at 43, when I'm getting older and need/want more sleep and can't "hang" like I used to. *shrug*[/quote]

Agree! [b]Juggling FT work and kids is so much easier when you are young! [/b]I'm a fairly energetic person, but there's a biological reason why fertility starts declining in your mid-30s![/quote]

How? The average 20 something has little to no accrued leave for maternity leave. Most 20 somethings aren’t even making enough to pay for childcare which is why it’s a career killer to have kids young.

In my 20s I would have had six weeks off post birth and my salary would not have paid for a nanny.

Having kids in my late 30s meant six months of leave, seniority that meant I could work remotely and a salary high enough to pay for a nanny.

I can’t see how having kids in HS is good for obtaining an education and don’t see how having kids in your 20s is good for building a career.

[/quote]

I didn’t have paid off when I had two kids in my 20’s.  However, I also didn’t have a giant house in the suburbs with the mortgage and maintenance costs to go with it, a long commute in an expensive vehicle, or generally luxury tastes or expectations.  I was still used to living like a broke college student, so while the expensive daycare years were tough, they weren’t *that* bad.

I have no idea why you would think that living on a tight budget would be a career killer.  My personal expenses had nothing to do with my career performance.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics