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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to work on your kids self esteem so he doesn’t easily become a target.
1. Homeschool him for the rest of the year.
2. Put him in a karate class asap especially one that has a bully curriculum.
3. Does he have a dad or male involved in his life?  His dad needs to spend one on one time with him.  Get him involved in Boy Scouts.
4.  Practice the cogat tests with him over the summer and request that he is retested in the fall.  Make sure he’s not in the bully kids class.  [/quote]

Homeschooling will NOT reduce school refusal or increase his confidence. Pleasr y’all just educate yourselves a tiny bit on the basic principles of handling anxiety and school refusal. [/quote]
I would love to see your peer reviewed studies on psychological outcomes of children being forced into environments where they are being heavily bullied and physically assaulted. [/quote]

there’s no evidence he’s being “heavily bullied” and OP’s story is that he is refusing because he’s embarrassed by the suspension, embarrassed even to go to therapy out of some kind of fear of others finding out, and also got bullied at his last school. All evidence points to anxious maladaptive coping by this kid, which yes, will only be compounded by letting him stay home. All of the literature on school refusal indicates correlation with mood disorders like anxiety, and every intervention is aimed at getting the child back into school.

This organization has good information: https://schoolavoidance.org/blog/

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OK so you have zero peer reviewed studies showing a bullied kid who has been seriously physically assaulted will do better when forced back to the same school where the bully hasn't even been removed from the classroom, just a literally mommy blog, which doesn't even address that extreme scenario. If I posted a Homeschool Defence League study on how awesome homeschooling is I'm sure you would object.

I have no idea how you have read this whole thread and said there is no evidence the boy is being severely bullied. I would think getting a tooth knocked out would obviously meet the definition of that.

I actually do like your advice to consult a psychologist who specializes in school refusal. OP will probably be shocked with the psychologist tells her that school environment is toxic to his mental health. Why do I think s/he will come to that conclusion? Because I have obstetric trauma induced PTSD and no therapist or psychiatrist has told me "Yeah, just get pregnant again and power through it, it will make you stronger! In fact, you should get pregnant tomorrow!!!!!!! LOL GOOD LUCK"

Again, the term anxiety implies a maladaptive fear response out of proportion to the situation, which is absolutely not the case. It is absolutely adaptive for this kid to fear the bully and to be scared around him because he has already been seriously assaulted by him. [/quote]

A school refusal psychologist is absolutely not going to recommend pulling the kid from school to to anxiety. 100% not going to happen. Theres a TON of literature on school refusal and zero of it recommends pulling kids from school. It recommends getting them back into school.

“ According to clinicians and researchers dedicated to school avoidance, exposure therapy is a first-line treatment that helps kids get back to school and has shown sustainable long-term results”

https://schoolavoidance.org/modes-of-therapy/

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