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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think this is more of a finance question than a real estate or midlife one, so posting here.
What are you doing with your real estate options when you get to say 55, or when you are empty nesters? Are you downsizing? Moving to a TH? Aging in place? Keeping a larger home for family gatherings, grandkids? What’s your plan?[/quote]

Is this post from 1975? Empty Nestor at 55 ready to retire?

That was back when my Uncles were cops and Firemen married HS sweethearts young and by 55 a full pension and kids long gone. Kids just went an inexpensive local college.

Today men and women are having kids much later. Their kids are having kids much later and college costs are insane.

When I was 55 I had a 16, 14 and 10 year old at home.

Hence the issue downsizing no longer works

My youngest graduates college when I am 67 and then wants to move home for grad school.

Then until they are married with kids I am still hosting holidays.

I thought I was an old parent but tons and tons parents my age at school.

My friend is 61 with a 13, 11 and 6 year old at home. Had last kid he was 55, wife 45.

55 year olds are still having kids and 25-30 years from retirement.

[/quote]

There are also plenty of people that age who become empty nesters, retire, and downsize.[/quote]

Yup!  Did have kid until almost 30, was done by 35, by 52 last kid was off to college.  
Sold big family home and moved into our 2 bed/2bath condo in the city.  Won't retire until kid is done with college but we could if we really wanted to, the money is ready and waiting

DOn't know about most people, but I don't want to be over 60 and still have kids on my payroll/supporting my kids because they are not yet out of college.  So we chose not to have a kid at 40+[/quote]

Also your body and your circumstances allowed you to “choose” that path. What a smug response that indicates lack of awareness of the realities of other people’s lives. [/quote]

DP here - I think it was more of a response to the poster calling us child brides for having a baby at 30. [/quote]

You are a child bride. When did you marry?

I would hate for my daughters to waste their youth getting knocked up and being a servant to some bum in exchange for when they are 55 can be an empty Nestor. You can’t be 25 at 55.

To be honest if I was a widower at 70 and met a hot 42 year who wanted a kid I have another.

[/quote]

Didn't waste my youth.  Got married at 22, first kid at 30, fully lived life before kids, once kids arrived and now really enjoying empty nesting in my early 50s. But have friends who had kids at 22, done by 24 and living life fully in their 40s without kids around.  Either way, you do what works for you.

Also, my son or daughter are allowed to select what to do in life themselves.  
[/quote]

+1. There are so many insecure people on DCUM. I would never attack someone for having a child at an age they deemed appropriate for them. I find that on DCUM women who had children at older ages seem to need to attack women who had children at younger ages. I never see this flipped unless someone is responding to a rude comment. Everything doesn't need to be endlessly picked over and compared and analyzed. We are all doing our best and because we are different people in different circumstances with different resources our best and how we even determine what our best is will be different but no one should feel superior or inferior to anyone based on the timing of when they had children. [/quote]

Yes, you do what works for you.  There are advantages to every scenario.  I know people who had kids at 20/21.  That is likely the "least attractive" solution to me.  It typically means the woman quit college to raise the kid.  Sometimes it means the guy did as well to have a job to support the family.  The perks are that by time you are 40/42, your kids are out of the house and you are still able to travel and do so much.  But the issue is, typically with that path, you struggled to get started and likely don't make as much as you would if you waited until 28-30 to have first kid.

28-30 for first kid is the "sweet spot" IMO.  You can be done having them by 34/35 and empty nesters by 55.  You were able to start your career (unless doctor or lawyer) and be well established, thus allowing you to stay at home for a bit, work PT, etc.  With careers well established, you can afford to live a better life than someone at 22 having a kid and still retire/be empty nesters while still able to really enjoy life/be healthy.

35-40 for having kids, works just fine, but fact is you run risk of higher possibility for health issues with mom/baby.  You will be 60 or so possibly older when your last kid exits the house after college. So you might need to work until 62/65 just because you have kids still under your care.  At 65+ you might not be able to travel and do same things as if you were empty nesters at 55.

Pick whatever works for you.  Life is too short to worry about others[/quote]

35-40 is very very young to stop having kids. I had my last kid at 45. I am still a very very young Dad next to my friends having kids in their 50s. 
Billy Joel has a six year old
Rod Stewart has a kid at 78 
Al Pacino had a kid at 83

Steve Martin had his first kid at 67

Naomi Campbell naturally had a baby at 53 and Hillary Swank had a kid at 48.  Brigitte Nielsen at 54

And retirement no longer exists. I heard yesterday the oldest muscian still performing started his band as a teen in the 1930s, He is 100 and still doing shows.  
 [/quote]

More power to you. We will absolutely be retiring at 55. Maybe sooner. We had our second and final child at 31. [/quote]

No kid relate - but I busted my butt to get my first big job at 44. Why the heck would I throw it all away at 55 to sit home all day in a tiny shoebox when I downsize watching soap operas and reality TV  waiting to die.

Instead I got a bigger job at 55. Was pretty exciting working on a two billion dollar project at a start up and seeing it through launch. So much that when it ended I did a second start up at 58. Finally at 61 my start up life ended and I decided I wanted to do something political in DC on the Hill. Which I am doing, exciting energy working on Capital Hill

My career was and is most exciting post 55.

I also bought a huge trade up home at 55 moving from 1,600 sf to 6,100 sf.

I am thinking maybe 63 I could try CEO or run for office.

Then I was thinking around 67 join a few boards.

Why be in a rush to die. I heard that retired men die with 5-7 years regardless of year you retire. Men who retire younger just die younger.

All the old men on my block work at least part time. My neighbor a psychologist works part time and had people over for Super Bowl at his 7,000 sf house and he is 90. Was he supposed to downsize and retire 35 years ago?

My last kid won’t be out till I am 70. I am not packing up a 6,100 sf house just to make some child brides happy. Until kids are married with kids thanksgiving, Xmas, graduations, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day all at my house. [/quote]

Well spouse was in c suite from age 32+.  Ceo at 43.  By 52 had successfully manage to get two private equity owners companies sold.  So been in those “exciting jobs” since late 20s.  With $30m+, still working to possible get another $30-40m but mainly because they still live the job.

However, plans to cut back/retire in next 2-3 years.  
We won’t be sitting at home in a shoebox.  We will be going between our two homes, traveling monthly to explore the world and enjoying what we love.  
At the level spouse is at, they will be able to consult/sit on boards as little or as much as they want for “retirement”
[/quote]

You are confusing money with work. I don’t work for the money. I work as I love work. I drive a used car and hardly spend money or travel. I work cause I like building things. Literally by Sunday around 3 pm every week am
miserable. Being trapped at home during Covid was like a prison camp. It was my own personal Vietnam. I still have PTSD from 2020-2022.

I think everyone who retired early should be rounded up and deported to work camps in third world counties to make the world a better place. [/quote]

Why?!?!?  If you want to work until you are near death, go for that.  My spouse enjoys working---otherwise they wouldn't still be working full time---I think 30M is more than enough.  But they are not ready to cut back yet, and more importantly have made a commitment to their employees to be around for another 3-4+ years and they value that commitment.

However, covid was not a Prison camp. We were not "trapped at home".  sure work happened from home, but ultimately it meant no commute, so when we were not working we were fully engaged with the family. [/quote]

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