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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why aren’t they doing save the dates? That is the whole point of this so people can arrange travel if they’re planning on attending. Invites go out like 6-8 weeks beforehand which is really short notice for cross country travel.

Personally I don’t see the big deal in OP asking. Sister could have said there’s no firm date yet if that was the case, which would have answered OP’s question. And if there is a date set then why is it being treated like a state secret, especially for a family member.

People on this board just love to trash the OP. If sister had posted and said “my sister texted me wanting to confirm my DD’s wedding date in order to book cross country flights and I decided not to tell her whether the date was set” people would be ragging on her. Like why can’t you just say yes or no about a date. It takes 2 seconds.

I wonder if something is going on behind the scenes like the wedding may not happen or us on shaky grounds …[/quote]

OP said they are the only out of town guests I think. If she wants to know she needs to just pick up the phone and ask, none of this text business.[/quote]

Are you serious? A phone call would be way more intrusive and inconvenient. A text takes 2 seconds to reply to. No one under the age of 60 should be picking up the phone and calling to ask this stuff without warning. I am 40 and basically never answer my phone unless someone texts first. [/quote]

Well, now you see why text isn't always best. OP said her sister won't give her daughter a dime so it's very likely there are some money fights going on about who is paying. If OP's sister isn't paying I bet OP can assume she won't be invited then because the niece will probably keep it small and nix family she's not even close to, like OP.[/quote]

I'm the only family. There is no one else. Its not that they didn't just not see me over the years they saw no one, ever. [/quote]

So you're not close. Don't count on being invited.[/quote]

My parents confirmed they asked for my address, but whi knows. Even my parents had no idea what to make of the text except that it's very on brand for my sibling and not at all out of character to be super evasive about everything. It's just frustrating because, again, I'm probably the only person flying my family across the country. [/quote]

How much time have you wasted over this text? Talking to people here, your parents, and god know who else. All because you can't actually call your sister. People can't communicate anymore.[/quote]

I was on the phone with my parents trying to coordinate logistics with them when the text came in. So it's not like these two things were separate. Of course it stopped our logistics in it's tracks.[/quote]

Logistics for what?[/quote]

My Aunt & Uncle live in the middle of nowhere - were talking drive 1 hour, wait for a ferry, on the ferry for 1 hour, then 3 hour drive. And that's after getting off of a 5+ hour flight.

But I figured out if we meet at the airport, we can drive together and it's a 2 hour drive, no ferry. So I was figuring out with them how we would handle it. [/quote]

You're planning all this for a wedding you haven't even been invited to yet? Maybe slow your roll.[/quote]

I mean, it's going to be hard for my family to be there. But I'm going to try my best. It's my niece. I only have 3 and may never have any other in my life. Despite how my sibling treats me, I do value them even if it isnt returned woth respect. [/quote]

You aren't close enough with your niece to even call her up. Your presence isn't as important as you might think it is. Just accept that if you buy tickets the wedding may not go on as planned and don't lord it over your sister and family or guilt trip them about it because you jumped the gun. [/quote]

I'm sure my presence isn't important to my sibling, that's been made clear. There just isn't any other family that cares so, if I'm invited, I'll be there. [/quote]

Why? You seem to really want to punish yourself and your kids over this. Are you trying to prove a point to someone? Who?[/quote]

I'm going to 1) support my neice since likely no other family from either side will be there 2) see my Aunt, Uncle and parents 3) my kids get to see their cousins. If by some miracle my other relatives come to an event I haven't seen them in 20 years and I will be very happy to see them.[/quote]

So you're using this supposed wedding for a family reunion trip? But can't ask your niece yourself?[/quote]

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