Reply to Parents of three, do you feel less bonded to your third?

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[quote=Anonymous]I think lots of families of three kids are happy and all the kids get what they need and are properly bonded to their parents.

I also think the stereotypes about oldest, middle, and youngest kids in 3-kid families don't come from nowhere, and there are of course families with three kids where the kids experience very common things (the neglected middle, the eldest who is expected to be responsible beyond their years, the baby who never becomes independent). It's not automatic, but it happens enough that if you have 3 kids, it's probably worth exploring why those things happen and what you can do to avoid it. I think one lesson for OP to get from this thread is that as she works on bonding with her youngest, make sure she doesn't take her older two for granted or fall into common mistakes that happen with this particular family size.

Finally, there is very clearly one poster on this thread who can't stand the idea of anyone, ever criticizing or even offering a more tempered viewpoint on 3-kid families. The nastiness and overzealousness of this posters comments on the thread reflect a lot of defensiveness, and it might be useful for that poster to ask why she feels so defensive about criticism that, according to her, does not apply to her family. For everyone else, I think we can just ignore!

Good luck OP. As is often the case, I think the mere fact that you are asking these questions indicates that you have what it takes to give all your kids what they need. The parents who actually thinks and worry about these issues usually manage to avoid the biggest mistakes. I mean, the very biggest mistake you can make is to just not care, and that's obviously not you![/quote]

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