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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My step son (20) got my 14 YO intoxicated & raped her while she was in & out of consciousness.  His mother is insistent that my daughter is lying & that her DS is the victim here.  It's insane what she is doing to further harm my daughter while trying to justify what her son did.  FYI that the son ADMITTED to both drinking & sexual contact with my 14 YO & the laws are very clear, but her son said that y 14 YO child "wanted it" and she is hellbent on trying to get him to not have any consequences.  My child did not consent, nor can a 14 YO consent, nor can an intoxicated person (adult or child) can consent, nor can someone unconscious (adult or child) consent.  Right after this came out, rapist momma got her son a kitten because we got kittens at our house & she felt like he was being excluded.  She then dropped this 20 YO rapist off at a local high school a few days later to hang out with underage girls, one of which he hooked up with when he was 19 & she was "14/15" according to text messages he sent himself, & now he is currently dating another underage girl with his momma's full approval.  The police will have a hayday with her response to his behaviors.  His dad, my partner, on the other hand, is really torn.  He sees the damage done to my child but also fears for his son's future, and I think it has been almost impossible for him to fully accept, but he has accepted some of those things.  It's hard to reconcile that the baby boy you loved and who can buy his mom flowers for mothers day or who you can laugh with at the dinner table can also have a dark side that is capable of harming a child in this way.  It's a difficult position to be in as the parent of the rapist when the rapist hurt your partner's youngest child.  With that said, time will tell what direction they all go & how it will impact the family as the detectives are wrapping up interviews & their investigations probably within the next month & that is going to be very telling.  I am hopeful that my partner will convince his son to just admit what he did so they can negotiate a fair plea.  I loved this young man as my own son for several years that I have been in their family, but the ex wife absolutely raised him to be this way-- never any accountability or consequences & a strong sense of entitlement that he obviously got from her.  She is a mamma bear and will walk through fire for him to protect him from the consequences of his own actions even if it means destroying a traumatized young girl who never wanted this.  My child is having extreme trauma responses because as a child who already had ADHD & social anxiety, she already is below her age with emotional regulation so throwing childhood trauma from a trusted & loved family member has completely destroyed her.  She can't even handle basic conflict or redirection without a full meltdown. I have taken so much time off work to help her that I no longer have vacation or sick days.  It's an impossibly difficult situation and we are barely getting by.  And time will tell if my partner will step up for what is right while also hoping for some mercy for his son or if he will crumble & follow his ex wife's manipulative insanity where she guilts him to "do anything to protect his son or he's a bad father"  Sorry lady.  He's only a bad father if he tries to cover up rape.  If he helps his son accept accountability & gives him love through the process, that is what will make him a good father.  But good parents expect accountability, even when it is hard.  So all you parents saying you would "protect" your son.  F*** you all if you won't include accountability in that because love without accountability is not love at all.  All I know is that I'm watching.  And if I see anyone betray my daughter to protect someone who caused such harm, I will cut ties & sink ships before you know it.  With that said, again, I loved this young man for years as my own & I hope that he gets fairness & an opportunity to have sex offender reprogramming so he can hopefully have a future that benefits society instead of harming it.

--Stressed & sad mother of a childhood rape victim[/quote]

I don't know what this post is...it's a rant. But in case it's real, I am so sorry for what your DD may have experienced here. Sounds quite traumatic. However, that kid's father is every bit as responsible as the mother--maybe more so, as it sounds like he abandoned his family and started another one. You absolutely cannot blame the mother and then hold the father blameless. You cannot.[/quote]

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