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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think I am different because I am not from the white American culture.  I want grandparents to spend easy time with grandkids, cuddling them, telling them stories, spoiling them etc.  I have never asked or expected the older generation to provide childcare or help in household chores.  Even when my DH or I spend time with the parents or ILs, we do a lot of chores for them and do everything possible that they are not inconvenienced and their lives are a little bit easier. 
 
My aim is that the older generation remain independent for as long as possible and that they remain in the lives of my children for as long as they can.  Taking care of my own kids, my parents and my ILs is the responsibility of my DH and myself.  I cannot believe that everyone expects elderly people to be their slaves and are resentful. The height of entitlement is something else. [/quote]

For the record, I think this is a fairly new phenomenon in the American white culture. But you are dead on. [/quote]

I don’t think this is new.  My grandparents stayed with us weekend a month while we were growing up, and my parents spent one of those nights at a hotel.

My grandmother also hosted every holiday in her home until she was in her 70’s.  She continued cooking for us for smaller events and came over with stuffing and sweet potatoes for Thanksgiving a few days before my daughter was born.

Some families are close and some aren’t.

[/quote]

Your parents went to a hotel to bang? Gross. You shouldn't even know this.[/quote]

What?  Why?  
Should they have lied about where they were?[/quote]

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