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[quote=Anonymous]I get it OP. It’s attention seeking behavior from a pushy person. So unwelcome! I had to deal with an extreme example of this. DH’s aunt would terrorize every host, trying to take over, making things harder, never actually contributing and then acting like she was the hostess.

1. Tried to turn every single event into a potluck and then control what everyone brought, often lying purposely so there would be mountains of food. She would set up a left over station and lord over it forcing everyone to take leftovers in disposable plastic containers with her name on it. She expected everyone to coordinate with her to return the unwanted containers. 
2. When a cousin decided to have the event she was hosting catered, aunt sent us an email on how poor Ellen couldn’t cope and was going to great expense so everyone needed to pull together to bring dishes that she would assign. She announced she was taking the reins. Cousins mother had to intervene to stop her. 
3. Told me that I couldn’t send the email invitations and collect RSVPs because people in 
HER family only respond to her. She had the manage the list. I said no and anyone who would weirdly not respond to an email to me wasn’t going to get a dinner cooked by me. Everyone responded without issue but she later sent a duplicate email with her as a the coordinator. She invited my MI
L’s ex husband who my MIL was in the process of evicting from one of her rental properties. 
4. Shows up an hour or two early and attempts to disrupt everything. Tries to throw butter into the dishes made for people who are vegan, moves furniture around, demands a full center table to display the turkey she decided to make..several hours ago and meal time/guests arrival isn’t for two more hours.
5. Brings an SUV full of crap that she gets free on Nextdoor as ‘gifts’ or for us to hold onto for her as she doesn’t have space. 
6. Plops her purse dog on the counter where we are preparing food.
7. Has created so much chaos, that she is the one to great guests at the door. Starts serving appetizers.
8, The whole time both her and her husband keep going whew, hosting is so much work.
9. Sets up her leftover station and lords over who gets what and decides to include a bunch of other stuff from our fridge. Tries to take my good pots home with her because she wants all the turkey juices. 
9. Even when not asked to make a toast, jumps up to give a long speech and then invites everyone to enjoy the food that was so much work. [/quote]

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