Reply to DH won't let DS (11) attend camps

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't think sleepaway camp is necessary, but if all the kid's friends are going, and the kid wants to go, and the parents can afford it, then this father's fears are preventing that.

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This is the real issue. [/quote]

Actually I don’t think that is the real issue at all. Going back to the OP’s original post, she says the kid’s “peers” (not “friends”) go to overnight “camps” (generally). She did not present it like you seem to be perceiving it — like, a bunch of his buddies are going to one particular camp, and her kid is the only one in the group not going and thus will feel left out. She just wants him to go to overnight camp because she went and therefore she thinks her child should, notwithstanding that the child’s father is opposed to it for reasons related to family trauma that should be respected. (And also, she is befuddled by what to do with her child if not sending him off to overnight camp because … logistics.

I’m not sure why the OP is so sure her child would enjoy overnight camp anyway, when she already said he has not liked any day camps. How does this general attitude improve by putting him in a setting where he cannot at least come home at the end of the day if he’s unhappy? [/quote]

What? Of course they're his friends. And it's not DS who doesn't like day camps, it's DH. It makes DS feel guilty about asking in general, much less for specific ones, every single spring.

And yes...some of us have strict working hours. We can't do 9 am dropoffs and 3 pm pickups.[/quote]

Which is why many camps actually have “extended day” options to allow for earlier drop-off and later pick-up. You really need to do some more legwork on this. Many of us have strict working hours and yet somehow figure out what to do with our children in the summer besides sleepaway camp. Maybe since your husband is so worried about the overnight camps, he needs to be part of the solution in terms of figuring out a plan for your son in the summer. No sleepaway camp….so, what now?  Really OP, you two sound completely inept.  This child is now 11. What have you done with him the last 10 summers? [/quote]

Yes. I am inept. I am a bad mother, the latest in a long time of them (you think my parents sent me off to Lake Bryn Mawr Camp every year for MY benefit?), and I'm well aware it's negatively affecting DS. I'm TRYING to fix it. But we don't live in the DMV anymore, and our day camps don't have extended days. Well - two do that I've found, but their "extended day" goes until 4. I have prior commitments that don't allow for coming in early and leaving late. DS has spent summers at home with me while I work. DH is not willing to research, because he "I didn't go to camps and turned out just fine."

So, fine. DS can spend all summer playing videos games and when he's 17 and unmotivated to go to school and have a career, I won't care. You all win. I'm only trying to do what's best for him, and all I get is crap for it. Time to write off his future. I guess I needed that realization. [/quote]

The easy solution is high a high school or college girl to do camp pickups and hand out with DS until your own commitments are over.  We've done this for many summers.  [/quote]

Young girls aren't reliable, please. And how would I keep him from playing video games in the meantime how exactly? I can't be in his room watching him like a hawk. If I take everything away, then I'm the bad guy - and I'm already that for saying no to Space Camp this summer.[/quote]

OK, so you’re a troll. Hopefully this thread gets deleted.[/quote]

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