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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Long story short: we will not get any financial aid. We make too much for help but don't make enough to go full pay at a private in a way that leaves any wiggle room.

We are just starting this process, and child is an athlete that is in the midst of recruiting (only D3 at this point b/c of NCAA limits- and FTR I don't care if DC plays a sport or not but she does). I'm looking at the finances of the various schools and was shocked to learn that some of the schools she's been talking to give NO MERIT aid. DC has excellent grades, community service, ECs, and athletics.

I get she's one of many like man others . . . and I know at DC there are no athletic scholarships. [b]But, how are people affording places like Wellesley[/b]? Their website and what I'm finding says they give ZERO aid on the basis that, essentially, "everyone there is special."

Yes, she can look elsewhere. And she is. But it is so sad to have to shut down a possibility that would, honestly, be such a perfect fit for her in every way. With room and board, etc. the cost per year is nearly $80K!!!! Two years would eat up more than our 529 has in it. Super bummed to have to limit her.
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They are either poor enough to get a lot of aid, rich enough to not need it, or had parents putting away a lot of money from conception. [/quote]

Well it is no shock that top schools would cost ~$80K/year when my kid would enter college.  So we did plan for that and sock away as much as we could from an early age, as we knew we wouldn't qualify for any FA.  Had we not been able to do that, our kid would have had to search out more affordable schools. [/quote]

Congratulations on making enough money to save 320k per kid? [/quote]

No, it's congratulation on planning.  [b]Anyone smart enough to save $160K should be smart enough to know that college will be up to $80K/year in 2022.[/b]  SO if attending those "Top schools" is important you plan accordingly. 
Had we not been able to save enough, I would have set the mindset with my kids that while you can apply to T40 schools, we might not be able to afford them.  So, you need to have a balanced list of college choices.  To me, the most important part is finding great schools that are affordable to YOU.  And there are many, many, many choices available for everyone.  The OP has ~$40K/year saved for DD.  There are literally hundreds of amazing options that will allow DD to graduate debt free.  If only the OP would change their mindset and focus on what's available instead of complaining.

Similarly, [b]I don't buy a house/car/vacation that I can't afford.  I live within my means, or deal with the consequences.  I don't expect others to compensate me for my lack of planning.[/b]  OP could likely now cash flow another $10K+/year if they wanted to, based on their statements.  So if the Top college is that important, they can do that and take parent loans and pay them off now that they have a higher income.  (not saying I'd recommend that, as I actually think that's a bad idea----no school is worth going into debt for). But there are options.  Smartest option (IMO) is to find a great school list that is affordable....and many many exist, just not T20 schools.  [/quote]

This is such an uber-American, "personal responsibility" thought pattern.  So when college costs $200K/year in the future, anyone who didn't "plan" should just be shut out?  How about when it gets to a million dollars a year?  Are we all good with it only being for the children of Elon Musk and the like and if we can't do it, well then the fault is somehow our own?

It has not always been like this.  Private schools have always been more expensive than public, but not to the degree they are now.

[img]https://www.visualcapitalist.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/Rise-of-College-Tuition_Datastream-1.jpg[/img]

Instead of pointing fingers at people for "lack of planning" by saving $300K+ / child, why aren't we demanding to know why the costs are so outrageously impossible for even wealthy people to handle?

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You are NOT SHUT OUT. You are simply shut out of the “luxury” product version of college. You feel entitled to a Louis Vuitton degree for your kid on your Coach budget. I’m sorry that you’ve bought into the idea that admissions are the ultimate arbiter of your kids’ merit but there are plenty of affordable options including community college. [/quote]

That is your reaction to these graphics?[/quote]

I'm not the PP, but basically yes. [b]College costs are crazy[/b] and, being a former FAFSA kid, I'm kinda shocked that OP, who also claims to have been on FA in college, didn't realize that the costs were outpacing inflation and wasn't setting expectations accordingly with their DCs. The number of parents who get to their kids' junior or senior years and have absolutely no idea on how financing college works is stunning.

OP, you have enough money set aside that your DC can land a merit scholarship, attend a great school, and graduate debt free. That would be so great for your kid and an opportunity neither you nor your husband were able to have. Rather than focusing on what probably cannot happen, lean in to the fabulous opportunities your DC can have that many kids are not able to experience.

GL to your DC![/quote]

You just breezed past this part.

You think it's A-OK that college costs are crazy and continue to be crazy for the indefinite future?  You're good with that?[/quote]

I agree college costs are crazy.  But in most states there are several options that cost ~$25K or less per year.  Or there are plenty of good schools with merit awards that will be similarly priced.  In fact, there are far more options that are "affordable" than the elite/$80K schools.  So instead of lamenting you can't afford ~50 schools, find the 200+ that you can afford and find the best fit.  In reality, your kid will get an education and do well in this world.  [/quote]

The point is. One should not have to. People who save aggressively and do everything their supposed to do. I drive a 12 yo car. Live in the same "starter" home. Etc. Etc. I'm no spendthrift. At what we have saved, we should be able to afford just about anything but costs have skyrocketed. The rich have choices. The poor get aid. The middle gets nothing but what's left over. [/quote]

My guess is that most middle class families would not trade their situations with the poor in order to get aid. That just wouldn't happen.[/quote]

And the poor get a lot less aid than you think. Yes, if they are high achievers who can get into T25-type schools they will likely get it covered 100%. But outside that tier they are not. And, the schools that might give good merit aid to your middle class student who can pay $30-$40k may turn down a poor student with a high EFC because while they can bring the cost down to $30-$40k, they can't bring it down to what that student can afford.

I volunteer with low income students to help them with college apps. Most of the students in our program end up going to NVCC aiming to transfer to UVA or VT or they go to GMU because they can live at home. [/quote]

Ding ding ding! Totally this. So hard to get admitted to a "meets need" school. I have one DC at a "meets need" and, having grown up working class, I can tell that many of his friends probably have a high EFC and are a mix of white and POC students. Most of them do not come home for any breaks other than winter and spring. The other DC is also at a meets need school, slightly more selective, and nearly all of DC's friends are from solid MC/UMC families. There are definitely FGLI students at the latter's school but do not seem as plentiful. [/quote]

I was that LMC/working class kid at an elite school.  I only went home at xmas break because that's all we could afford (900 miles from home).  I had to work constantly on every break I had and during the school year, all while double majoring in two very time intensive/difficult majors (completing 6.5 years worth of courses in 5 years).  I still had to take out loans.  While half my friends went skiing or to Mexico or Europe over breaks, I was working 40+hour weeks.  I was that kid who had to debate--do I really need to purchase the textbook or not as I didn't have enough money.  I would have given anything to come from a home where I had more $$ growing up and parents who went to college who knew how to support me when I wanted to attend college. 
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