Reply to feeling guilty that husband left church because of me

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "feeling guilty that husband left church because of me"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why don't you both go to mass together and try it out? What are you afraid of?[/quote]

I'm not interested in going somewhere I can't fully participate. The Eucharist is meaningful to me, so skipping a week to sit at his church like a lump when I could be worshiping isn't something I'm willing to do. I'm totally ok if he goes, though.[/quote]

Well, I see that you're just not willing to compromise or give an inch. Maybe you could go to just see what it's all about and then attend your own service. You don't believe in it so why would you want to fully participate anyway? Have you never attended a religious service for any of your other friends? Weddings? Funerals? Did you pout that you couldn't fully participate or did you attend to support these people in something that was meaningful to them?[/quote]

No, the issue is that by attending his church, I am missing mine.  Weddings and funerals aren't the same since they don't overlap my own worship. See the difference?[/quote]

It's an hour out of your day. [b]Most churches have multiple services[/b]. You wouldn't be missing anything.[/quote]

That take place at roughly the same time of the week. Are you being intentionally obtuse?[/quote]

No moron, many churches have mutlple services. You can go at 7, 9, 11, or 5pm the night before (Saturday) which is common in Catholic Churches. Check the church website, then pick a time and then attend your church at your favorite time. Are you always this difficult? But be real, you have no intention of doing this and are making up BS excuses that don't even make sense. You're scared you might actually like it.[/quote]

This schedule isn’t common outside of Catholic churches , especially when it comes to Saturday services.  You are looking at this through the view of one specific denomination.[/quote]

DP. 
I think the suggestion was that you could attend a Catholic service at an off-time, possibly freeing you up to attend your own service on Sunday morning.

OP, I wish you well. I read a ton of anger on this thread. I understand it, but from this outside perspective I see that it isn’t going to help you or your husband. I obviously don’t know you, but I wonder if attending both together for a couple of weeks would help spark some conversation. [/quote]

Honestly, I wasn't angry until the continued suggestions (by a single Catholic, I suspect) that I attend Catholic mass. I've been over that for years. Just afraid I'm getting in the way of his own faith, and I do not want to do that, because I know how much the church and God and sacraments mean to me. [/quote]

And as a non Catholic, I just don’t get it.  You invite him to your church, where he can worship Jesus (and seems to be doing so - which in a Christian perspective means his salvation is assured).  And you aren’t preventing him in any way from attending a Catholic Church, if that is what he prefers.  He is an adult.  He decides.[/quote]

If the anger the OP has expressed here is also expressed in the home, then she is preventing him (in a way). [/quote]

OP has said she is only angry at the suggestion that she attend a Catholic service which she is under no obligation to do (and it doesn’t appear that her husband is asking her, but rather a poster here).[/quote]

Page 2. The OP states attending Mass or not has caused fights in their marriage.[/quote]
Fundamentally she’s angry that the catholics won’t give her the sacraments of the eucharist and marriage (although they could give her this one if she accepted being barred from the former). But in her heart of hearts, she is rightfully incensed that her DH is failing to live up to his unequal yoke. [/quote]

No, I received the sacraments elsewhere, so I not angry about being barred from them. I am angry at the poster who keeps insisting I "try" Catholic mass, knowing it's an empty gesture for a non-Catholic. [/quote]
But you won’t sit through Mass because you can’t receive communion. And you won’t get your marriage convalidated in the church because you met a mean priest who used imagery in his speech but upheld catholic teaching on marriage. And you’re upset your MIL acknowledges the Catholic reality of you and your DH’s situation. You should talk to a priest about your scrupulosity, but your conscience is clearly inflamed right now for legit reasons.[/quote]

My conscience is not inflamed. Would you like being called a whore when you waited for your wedding night? I doubt it.[/quote]
This whole thread is literally about you feeling guilty! You literally said the priest didn’t actually call you a whore! Ok maybe you are a troll after all LOL[/quote]

AND she said this “whore” comment occurred after they were married. Here she says it was before her wedding night.

[/quote]

I said it happened during convalidation discussion. We'd already been married for a while by that point. [/quote]

If you went to a convalidation meeting you must have known that to go through to the ceremony you would have had to convert. If not, surely your husband knew the rules and knew you would have to convert, be baptized., etc. before the marriage would be validated. Is that where the fighting started. You refused to become Catholic for the convalidation, which I assume your husband wanted?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics