Reply to Annoyed that ILs are unhelpful to us when we visit them, but expect us to do a ton as “good guests”

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Reply to "Annoyed that ILs are unhelpful to us when we visit them, but expect us to do a ton as “good guests”"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP again.

This thread took on a life of its own!

To the PP who thinks I’m asking for all day babysitting on top of the hosting ILs do: I’m neither asking for babysitting nor are my ILs doing any of the traditional hosting duties. They provide dinner - and we are expected to sit for a long period of adult conversation while our kids sit quietly, which they can’t do for more than 20 min max - and we are on our own for other meals.

Nothing was cleaned before our arrival. Nor were the beds made, nor were there towels in the bathroom - DH dug through and found some sheets and made the beds. Nothing was cleaned up, and their house is covered in not just trinkets but MILs medication, which apparently needs to be spread about the house in non child safe pill boxes. It requires constant monitoring just to keep my 2 year old safe.

But hard to do that monitoring when I also have to prep breakfast / lunch and do dishes for the 5 of us in a kitchen that isn’t mine.

And the icing on the cake is that despite not fulfilling traditional hosting duties by providing us a clean / decently safe house and perhaps planning more than one meal a day, we are expected to entertain THEM.

Perhaps what DH should have done is not tried to entertain them under these conditions. We could have made it obvious that we have no time to sit and chat when we are in their house with 3 kids and no assistance. But if they wanted us to have the space to sit and talk to them like grown ups, they should have done more to be helpful.

And PS - we left early!

Thanks to those who can commiserate. [/quote]

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