Reply to Annoyed that ILs are unhelpful to us when we visit them, but expect us to do a ton as “good guests”

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Annoyed that ILs are unhelpful to us when we visit them, but expect us to do a ton as “good guests”"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What’s this whole they are cooking “for her”? They are hosting, yes? Or is the expectation that when adult children visit able bodied parents they - the children - need to cook and clean etc? I am very confused. I am not saying the grown children shouldn’t cook or clean or offer to pick up takeout/go to dinner (bc really who wants to cook in someone else’s kitchen). [/quote]

I'm not sure I follow your confusing post. Are you saying 2 elderly people make enough food for 7 on a daily basis and just happen to be setting a few extra plates out during this visit since they aren't cooking "for" anyone as if it's not any extra work? How is everyone getting fed during this visit? It sounds like at the very least OP is being asked to put her dishes in the dishwasher which is not a very big ask. It sounds like the ILs have prepared their home, are feeding their guests, talking to them, and otherwise being good hosts. They just aren't doing all the "nannying" on top of all the other chores hosting involves.[/quote]

I am the PP you are replying to. I guess my point is - the ILs invited this family of five over. That means they cook and clean or if not cook they provide takeout or if they can’t then they tell the kids to bring stuff.  If they don’t want to provide the food etc then why host in the first place? And spending time with young kids is important because if they only want to see their adult child then don’t make it a family visit. [/quote]

The ILs aren't complaining about the meals. OP is complaining that they aren't doing even more by watching 3 small kids on top of what they are already doing. OP doesn't want any chores thinks the hosts need to be doing everything. Meanwhile the DH is doing..... nothing.[/quote]

Yep. MIL should be watching the kids while she cooks three meals for seven people every day and then does all the dishwashing and cleanup. So OP can enjoy the same chore-free vacation her DH is enjoying.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics