Reply to Diversity of schools - can this work both ways? Am I being unreasonable?

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Reply to "Diversity of schools - can this work both ways? Am I being unreasonable?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I haven't read all the replies and I'm sure there's interesting stuff in there.

But I'll say that there's actual research about this, a "tipping point" at which white parents feel comfortable sending their child to a school. It's 26% or so.

We were in one of the only majority white elementary schools in our city and then there was a rezoning which sent my white dominant neighborhood to a school that was over 90% Black. Oh boy, the weeping, the gnashing of teeth. You can't tell me subconscious (or conscious) bias isn't real when you see how people reacted to the news they might have to move from one highly regarded school one mile away to another highly regarded school one mile away. On the flip side, there were many people who said, look guys, let's not be ridiculous, this is the right thing to do . . . but I'd say about half of those people quietly slipped away to majority white spaces after talking the good talk. So in my daughter's class she was the only white girl (plus one white boy) that first year. This wasn't our first time in a scenario like this . . . she'd been to a birthday party where she was the only white child before. So my concern was minimal.

And at the end of the day I shouldn't have had any concern at all. We're now in year 3 and my kid is thriving and says it's even better than the old school. Of course there are all sorts of issues to grapple with like the role of the PTA (which is super white compared to the makeup of the school), how to become part of an established community without trying to change it, how to facilitate friendships outside of school, and how kindergarten and first grade are much whiter than the upper grades (about 35%) and we could eventually become like the school we left.

When we went to that birthday party when our kids were young where we were the only people who weren't Black, I had to really sit with myself and admit that I wasn't some unbiased exception to the rule. I had to recognize that people of color experience that dynamic all the time. And when you hear white people talk about sending their kids to a school where they'll possibly be the only white child and saying, "I don't want them to be a guinea pig," you have to be disgusted at the racism inherent in that statement. Something is only tried and true if white people have been there? WTAF?

I'm sure someone has recommended already, but I highly recommend the Nice White Parents podcast. Don't be those folks. But also, don't avoid a community that would welcome you out of fear. Just commit yourself to humility and an open heart.[/quote]

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